Page 53 of Amidst the Insidious Courts
No. I hadn’t considered any of those things. Why would I? I wasn’t raised in this world.
“I just wanted to do something to acknowledge the pain it must have caused her to betray her queen just to give us a warning,” I mumble.
“Don’t worry.” Lore smiles, Wraith easily keeping up with Blizzard’s gait. “If either of those things happen, I get to kill her. It’s a win-win!”
“I suppose this could be why Danu chose one of the realm’s most prolific assassins as your Guard,” Bree says, coming up on our other side.
Swallowing, I try my best to tune the two of them out. I didn’t mean to accidentally sentence poor Neila to death.
“You must not blame yourself,” Mab murmurs, clearly uncomfortable with the business of trying to console me. “You are still learning.”
How long does that excuse last? My headache pangs a little harder, and I grimace, which she catches. “How are you feeling?”
Turning my head away, I open my mouth to tell her I’m fine, but the words die on my tongue, proving them a lie. “I feel… weak.”
“Headaches? Nausea? Cramps?” Mab presses, floating closer to us.
Not wanting to admit to all those things, I simply nod in answer. “I can handle it.” I’m used to pain—I know how to keep up appearances when I feel weak.
If Drystan had relaxed at all with the selkie’s departure, he tenses once again at my admission. Spurring Blizzard into a full-on gallop, he mutters something dark under his breath.
Mab has to fly faster to keep up, but she doesn’t complain. “The cloister will help,” she promises. “You’re in the final stages now. The temple will have herbs and things that will ease the worst of things until it peaks.”
The city gates are a blur. The scent of flowers cloys my nose as we ride past cobbled streets filled with fae calling out blessings. I should smile, wave, something—but all of the desire to do so is wiped out by an unexpected burst of fear.
For so long now, the fever has been a looming threat in the future. Now that we’re here, I’m confronted with the knowledge that it’s coming, and there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it.
“We’ll take care of you,” Jaro murmurs, riding up close beside Drystan as we’re forced to slow by the crowds and the narrow streets. “You don’t need to be afraid, Rosie.”
The rest of my Guard surrounds Drystan’s horse, forming a barrier between me and the fae cheering my arrival. I squeeze my eyes shut, like it can block out the noise, but when I open them again, the world is blurry and painfully bright.
The Call buzzes fiercely in my chest, and my head turns instinctively, drawn like a magnet to the far side of the street. Even my worsening vision isn’t enough to prevent me from recognising a familiar pair of turquoise eyes watching from the back of the crowd.
“Caed,” I whisper, knowing—despite the glamour—that it’s him.
He’s here, just like I knew he would be.
In those eyes is a deep, tormented question. A plea he’ll never voice. His lips part, his hand reaching out towards me, and my heart skips a beat.
Slowly, deliberately, I turn away, letting my eyes flutter shut.
I don’t need to see him to know what that did to him. He’s half fae, and just like the rest of my Guard, his instincts will be screaming at him to be close to me. If I’m honest, mine are doing the same. His bond to me—usually so cutting and sharp in my chest—is dull and bleeding from my rejection.
“I’ll deal with the Fomorian,” Bree says, peeling off from the group without giving the others time to argue.
“Fucking idiot,” Jaro says. “How on earth can he bear to be apart from her right now?”
“All pain is relative,” Drystan comments. “He’s experienced worse.”
“That doesn’t explain how the Fomorian is walking away from her as well,” Jaro grouches.
It does. But Caed’s pride would never allow them to know how he’s suffered at the hands of his father.
Hooves clatter across cobbles, cheers give way to murmurs of greeting, and then finally, Blizzard stops.
“Jaromir, take her. I’ll see to the horses.”
I’m jostled between arms, and I hear Kitarni murmur a greeting, but I can’t bring myself to open my eyes. Tiredness whispers seductively in my ear, promising relief from the ache.
