Page 19 of With This Kiss
And because we had each other.
But I didn’t have her anymore.
A sharp pain formed in the center of my heart, and tears blurred my vision.
I thought after three months of crying myself to sleep every night that I would be all cried out.
That wasn’t the case at all.
It appeared I still had some tears left.
I quickly wiped them away and grabbed my phone.
Anger and sadness waged a war inside me, and I didn’t know which to let win.
I wasn’t thinking when I typed the number I had already memorized into the message box. I quickly typed in the word “Hi,” before moving my thumb over to the send icon, hesitating for only a quick second before pressing it.
The message was sent instantly, and there was no space for regret. I couldn’t get it back, even if I wanted to.
And no more than ten seconds later, my phone beeped with a new notification.
Reign had messaged me back.
My eyes burnedfrom lack of sleep as I walked into the small coffee shop.
Preston was already there, waiting for me with a black Americano—my coffee of choice.
His face lit up as he stood when he saw me approaching.
I tried to smile, but I was sure it didn’t reach my eyes. There weren’t a lot of things I found worth smiling about in the last three months, and today was no exception.
Preston didn’t try to hug me, though his fingers did twitch when I got close, almost as if he wanted to reach out and touch me.
He knew I didn’t like to be touched by anyone.
Etta was the only one I could have near me without feeling like a million little ants were crawling all over my body.
But Etta was gone.
And it was just me in a world filled with people I didn’t want close to me.
“Hey,” I said, sitting down on the chair across from him. He stood there for a long, awkward moment before he sat back down. His eyes moved over my face, probably taking note of the dark creases under my eyes. I should have worn more foundation. I hadn’t slept since Reign messaged me back with a simple “Hi.”
He didn’t ask who I was.
He knew it was me, and it sounded almost like he had been expecting me. As if my making the first move tobuy him dinnerwas a foregone conclusion. As if it was the only expected outcome.
I didn’t respond.
And he didn’t text me back.
“Thanks for the coffee,” I said, taking a sip of the nearly lukewarm liquid, working hard not to make a face. I wished he hadn’t bought it for me. I could have done that, and maybe now I would be drinking hot coffee instead of this mess.
I didn’t voice that thought. I forced the liquid down my throat and offered him another smile.
He seemed happy with that, taking a sip of his own drink. “It’s been so long since we’ve done this, I was starting to think you were going to ignore me forever.”
“I wouldn’t do that,” I said. “I’ve just been busy.”
