Page 69 of Sweet Disaster
Lancaster nor his agent could be reached for comment. As an unrestricted free agent, Lancaster could possibly be picked up by an NBA team later this summer when teams start their negotiations with free agents.
Lancaster averaged 5.3 points, 3 rebounds and 1.3 assists per game in the EUBA last season. He’d shown some real promise in his final few games with theFury.
My mind reels as I finish reading and rereading the article. It was dated nearly three weeks ago. Holy shit, that was just after I left him in Rome.
My heart beats spastically and I feel sick. I close my eyes, rubbing the slow-growing headache that’s building there.
God, I feel awful for him. He must have been blindsided by this news. He loved playing basketball. Maybe that’s the reason he’s been MIA and hasn’t called me like he promised.
Without a moment to second-guess myself, I pick up my phone from where it landed by my toes a minute ago. Now I’m certain I need to get ahold of him. He must be freaking the fuck out.
The phone rings a few times as I hold my breath and wait. On the fourth ring, it goes to voicemail.
In an uncharacteristic move on my part, I actually leave a message.
“Hey Gavin, it’s me. Kady. I was…um, well, I just read something online about your team. And, I wanted to see how you were doing. What you’ve been up to,” I practically stammer with a lack of finesse. “I’m back in the U.S. again. It’s a long story, but my dad found me and dragged my ass back home. Well…I just wanted to say hi. I’d love to talk to you. Call me back, okay? Ciao.”
Geez, that was pathetic.
I stare at the phone mindlessly, wondering if it was the right thing to do. An inchworm of worry wiggles its way into my head as I consider that he might not call me back. What if he decided I was too much trouble? That with everything going on in his life, I was just another nuisance that he didn’t have time for. Or that our time wasn’t as special to him as it was to me.
Goddammit, why didn’t I tell him how I felt before I left him in Rome?
I had no regrets about what happened between us. But now I do regret not telling him how much he meant to me when I had the chance.
Why was I such a coward?
My heart thumps wildly and erratically knowing the real reason I ran like a scared kitten.
Because I fell hopelessly in love with him.
And now I don’t know if I’ll ever get a chance to tell him how I really feel.
