Page 42 of Sweet Little Lies
“My mom died last year,” I finally admit, turning back to face him. His expression goes from angry to ghost white in a flash.
And then sympathy floods his eyes. “Ah fuck. Shit man, I had no idea. Why the hell didn’t you say anything? When did this even happen? And how the hell didn’t we know about this?”
My brow scrunches in guilt. We were at an away game playing against Southern Cal when she finally passed away. At the time, it had been a week since I’d last visited her. She’d been moved from the hospital to in-home hospice and I was too busy to go see her.
Either that, or I was too much of a coward. And I didn’t want to face the man that deemed me unworthy of being his son. The son he put down every chance he got. The one he accused of killing his youngest son. That part was true, I guess.
Clearing my throat, I wipe the wetness that starts to leak from my eyes. I loved my mom and I miss her every day.
“Right before the championship tournament started. Last February.”
I see the wheels turning in Cade’s head. He’s sifting through his memories to see if he remembers anything out of the ordinary. But no, I kept it locked away. I didn’t tell anyone. Not even the Coaching staff. I just took a sick day to attend her funeral. Then I got rip roaring drunk and said my goodbyes. Fucked myself up, got myself laid, and put everything else behind me.
“I’m really sorry, man. I wish you would’ve told us. Are you okay? What about your dad?”
Anger that I didn’t even realize could be conjured just from the question, boils beneath my skin. My body heats up, my chest and neck become tight and itchy. I take another drink and wash away the hatred for the man who claims to be my father.
“He’s a fucking asshole and I haven’t seen him since the day we put her in the ground.”
Silence drowns out all the noise in the bar between us. Cade stares at me with wide, concerned eyes.
“Whoa…that’s fucked up man.”
At least with Cade, I know he understands. In fact, Carver would too. We’ve all dealt with some shitty father-son situations. But at least with those two, they’ve since reconciled and patched up their relationships. As for me and my old man, well, that will never happen. He will die despising me and vice versa.
I shrug and confirm the truth. “It is what it is. And as long as I can get through this final school year, then I can be done with him for good.”
The only connection I have with my Dad at this point is that he still pays for my tuition. Although, he continues to tell me that he can flip the tables on me at any point if he feels like it. So, it’s best that I just keep my distance from him and not give him cause to ruin my life and future.
As long as he doesn’t see me or is reminded about what a loser his son is, I’m safe.
“Anyway, there you go. Now let’s talk about some happier shit. Tell me what we’re gonna plan for your bachelor party when the time comes. We gonna do a road trip to Vegas?”
That just earns me a burst of hearty laughter from Cade which tells me I’m way off base with my idea.
