Page 22 of Reckless Abandon
Sage chuckles and he stands, walking toward the edge of the pool, his back to me.
He looks pretty good from every angle, especially his backside – considering all he’s been through. Still tall and lanky, but bulkier now with tattoos wrapped around his arms and calf. I haven’t seen his bare back, but I’ve heard he has a full masterpiece in vibrant colors across his shoulder blades.
I’m struck with a sudden desire to see him naked and find all the tattoos he has hidden from the world that the casual observer wouldn’t know exist.
“If you think I was the one to take care of her, you obviously don’t know me at all.” He replies heartlessly. He stares off toward London who is now brushing the horse’s coat near the stable.
Sage’s voice turns wistful. Nostalgic. “She was the only one who ever loved me no matter what. And I fucking pissed all over that. She’s a tough girl, though. She knew her mind and never gave in just to placate me.”
He grows silent and bends his head as I stand up and move behind him. Placing a hand at the nape of his neck, I squeeze gently but firmly, feeling the bristle of his hair over my fingers. Unable to stop myself, I tip his head toward me, closing the distance between us.
My lips land at the top of his head and I kiss him once. He resists for a moment, but then gives in with a sigh. It’s my way of telling him thank you for being with her. For his perseverance in digging himself out of the hole that was left behind in his life and making something of himself. It’s a kiss that says, I’m sorry I hurt you and fucked up. I love you, still.
My lips move down the side of his face, over the bristle of his jawline until they land on the corner of his mouth. Neither of us move for a moment, scared of what happens next. Worried it will open Pandora’s Box and the history of our lives will come barreling out.
I cover his mouth with mine, a kiss to say all the things I can’t tell him. His lips infuse with mine and our breaths are labored. There’s no tongue and it’s not overly lustful, but the kiss packs enough punch to prove to him that I truly mean what I say. As I pull away to a wide-eyed Sage, the words to tumble out of my mouth.
“Sage, I’m so sorry for the way I ended things. How I treated you and left you when you needed me the most. You have absolutely every right not to forgive me, but I hope someday you will consider it.” I stop for a moment and purse my lips together tightly. “I was young and stupid and scared.”
“Yeah, fucker. You and me both.”
I swallow, trying to get out all the words that have lived inside my heart for years.
“I know. But I was scared of you. Scared of having you. Losing you. Loving you. It was never my intent to hurt you when you were going through the worst ordeal of your life. Especially when I loved you so fucking much.”
He yanks his head back and out of my grasp, glaring at me with malice.
“You loved me? You’re a fucking asshole,” he spits, pushing me away with a hard shove at my pecs, stepping out of my reach. “You sure had a funny way of showing it.”
I rub a hand down my face with disgust. Sage is absolutely right to resent me for being such a dick to him. I’m just about to say more when London appears and interrupts us.
“Good morning, boys.”
Her megawatt smile washes over us and casts a magic spell, making the last ten years disappear into thin air. “How about I go wash up and meet you two in the kitchen in fifteen and we can make some breakfast and get caught up.”
She waves at us both and heads into the house, turning to give us a flirty wink.
“And don’t you think I don’t remember how good your pancakes are, Cameron Lucas.”
My eyes dart from London’s retreating form to Sage and back again when he pivots and follows her.
“You heard the lady,” he calls over his shoulder, with a chuckle and a shrug. “Better not keep her waiting. She’s a bitch when she’s hangry.”
I guess I’m on pancake duty. And the rest of our conversation will go on the back burner, along with that kiss.
Chapter 14
Ten Years Earlier
I’d avoided the calls and texts and other attempts that London had made to reach me for two days straight. I was still seething with pent-up rage and confusion over what I let happen with Sage. With the way I just let it happen.
What the fuck was I thinking?
Oh yeah, that’s right, I wasn’t. Sage had done some gay erotic voodoo magic on me the minute he touched me.
At least that’s what I thought, anyway. And thankfully, he’d been kind enough to find ways to avoid me and had slept on the couch the previous two nights, only coming home when I was already asleep in my bed. I should’ve felt guilty for acting like a prick when he was the one who was going through so much turmoil. It made me sick to my stomach to know that once he went to trial, there was a really good chance he’d be sentenced to prison.
I’d be heading to boot camp to learn combat skills to fight for our country’s freedom, and he’d likely be locked up for an unknown period of time withouthisfreedom.
