Page 4 of Reckless Abandon
“Let me call my dad first and see what he thinks. He knows a few attorneys and was in the military long enough to know a little bit about the judicial system and process.”
I wasn’t worried that my dad wouldn’t know, but I worried he would hold me back from getting involved. And that just wouldn’t do.No sir. I’d do anything to make sure Sage was okay and wouldn’t need to spend even one night in a jail cell.
We gathered up our remaining things and walked to the door. Glancing back, I took one last wistful sweep of the room, mentally giving a good-bye to the night we had planned. Sage and I had wanted to make it perfect for London. He’d even written her a song he was going to play for her on his guitar.
It wasn’t supposed to end like this. It was supposed to be a final farewell to the three of us. Our send-off before I went to boot camp and joined the Air Force, Sage went off to Nashville to start his music career and London went off to college.
But sometimes the universe tips you on your side, shaking loose any semblance of control you thought you had, and knocking you on your ass. Those earthquakes are meant to remind us that we have no fucking control over anything.
Chapter 3
Present Day
“Hi,” London says with that soft lilt that always had a way to melt my insides. “I’m sorry to have just shown up like this, but I ran into your mother in town and she said you were back. I had to come see for myself.”
I don’t know if I should laugh, cry or hug the shit out of her. Of course, my mother would mention I’m here. She was always a fan of London’s and always thought of her as one of her own children.
I lift a shoulder. “Gotta love small town news. It travels faster than the FedEx truck on speed.”
She laughs at this, out of commiseration or something else, and tucks a piece of her blonde hair behind her ear. The sun silhouettes her from behind and she has an ethereal glow; as if an angel or one of those shimmering oasis images you see on a hot, paved highway.
“I heard about your sister, too. My mom called me when it happened. I’m so sorry, Cam.”
Now her voice is laced with sympathy and condolences. I turn back to stare at the lake to avoid her penetrating eyes. She would see right through me.
My younger sister, Jeanine, recently passed away. I wasn’t able to come home for her funeral a month earlier because I was fighting a wildfire ripping through the Smoky Mountain national forest. I had to leave my mother alone with no one else around, to deal with the shitty circumstances of burying her only daughter.
I sense her approach and feel the prickle of her heat as she closes in on my space. The scent of her perfume – peaches and cream - that I would recognize anywhere surrounds me and transports me back to my youth. I hide the gun underneath my thigh and fist my hands on my lap to refrain from reaching out and touching her. Keeping myself from drawing her into my side and burying my head in her neck.
“Thanks. But you didn’t have to come all the way back home. I know you’re busy.”
London lays a hand on my shoulder and I nearly jump out of my skin. It’s been way too long since I’ve felt that touch. Since our time together as lovers and friends.
Two things we aren’t any longer.
Not after all that’s happened between us.
London slips off her sandals and sits down next to me, dangling her feet over the dock, kicking at the cool water underneath.
“Cam, don’t be stupid. Of course, I’d be here for you and your family. They are…” She stumbles over the words. The lie. “They’ve always been like family to me.”
My head snaps sharply to the side, as I glare at her with undeserved blame and persecution. It’s easier to pitch my anger in her direction rather than at my dead sister, her disease or the world. London is here, in the flesh, and the source of my discomfort.
My voice is venom. “They haven’t been your family in a long time.”
She gasps like I’ve just stuck a knife in her back. And maybe I have with my hurtful remark. In reality, we know it wasn’t London who caused the riff. It was me and the decisions I made.
The decision to marry someone else. And to hurt London and my family in the process.
I’d always been a people-pleaser, trying to do right by everyone involved. Yet the moment I made a choice solely for myself, I hurt everyone. My parents were wrecked with disappointment knowing I was marrying a woman I really didn’t love when it was so obvious I still loved London. So, I did what any gutless, spiteful prick would do. I forbid my family and London from coming to my wedding.
London closes her eyes and inhales deeply, allowing me a moment to look her over. So much has changed in ten years but everything about London is the same. Her golden sun-kissed hair, dewy skin and soft, lush lips that I’ve tasted and kissed and had wrapped around my…
Pushing the inappropriate thoughts away, I steel my resolve to avoid those topics all together.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
Her remorseful smile is still gentle and kind but gilded with pain. Yet it still holds the solace I seek.
