Page 15 of A Season of Second Chances
But then her hands are on my chest, gently pushing me back.
"Wait," she says, breathless. "Wait, we need to stop."
I pull back immediately, searching her face. "Did I do something wrong?"
"No, God no." She's breathing hard, her cheeks flushed from more than just the cold. Her lips are swollen and pink, as she reaches out with her tongue to collect my taste off of them. "This is... this is amazing. You're amazing. But we shouldn't jump into this just because we're feeling close and the setting is as romantic as a snow globe."
I can't help but smile at that. "A snow globe, huh?"
"You know what I mean." She touches my face, her fingers tracing my jaw. "I left you once, Winter. I broke your heart and ran away because I was scared. I don't want to make any decisions right now that I might regret later. That we might regret later."
She's right. I know she's right. But that doesn't make it any easier to slow down when all I want is to lose myself in her.
"Okay," I say, pressing my forehead to hers, trying to steady my galloping heart and raging hard on. "Okay, we'll take it slow."
"Thank you." She kisses me softly, sweetly. "I'm not saying no. I'm just saying not yet. Not until we're both sure this is what we want and not just nostalgia or proximity or hormones."
"I get it," I interrupt gently. "And you're right. Alana's involved in this now too. I can't just jump into something without thinking about how it affects her."
"Exactly." Joy settles back against my chest, and I wrap my arms around her, holding her close. "Let's just enjoy this time together. No pressure, no expectations. Just see what happens."
"I can do that," I say, even though every fiber of my being wants to tell her that I already know what I want. That I've always known. She's it for me, always has been, always will be. It's like everything I've always wanted is right here within reach, and I can't reach out and grab it.
But she's right to be cautious. We're not kids anymore. We have responsibilities, histories, scars. We can't just pick up where we left off and pretend the last ten years didn't happen.
So instead, I hold her and watch the fire and the snow, and I tell myself that this is enough for now. That whatever happens between us will happen in its own time.
"Winter?" Joy's voice is sleepy, muffled against my coat.
"Yeah?"
"I'm really glad I got stranded here."
I tighten my arms around her, breathing in the familiar scent of her hair. "Me too, Joy. Me too."
We stay like that for a long time, wrapped up in each other and the moment, while the snow continues to fall and the fire burns. And for the first time in ten years, I let myself hope that maybe, just maybe, we'll get a second chance at the life we were supposed to have.
Eventually, we head back inside, our hands clasped together, and I walk her to her room. At her door, she turns to me.
"Thank you for tonight," she says softly.
"Thank you for staying."
She rises on her toes and kisses me one more time, soft and sweet and full of promise. Then she's slipping into her room, and I'm standing in the hallway, grinning like an idiot.
As I head to my office to check on Alana, I realize that this Christmas might turn out to be the best one I've had in years. Not because of presents or decorations or traditions, but because Joy is here.
And this time, I'm not going to let her get away without a fight.
Nine
Joy
Now that I'm back in my room by myself, I'm feeling the same loneliness I've felt in my apartment. Those few hours I was with Winter and Alana, I wasn't lonely. There were people around to share my time with.
Tears pool in my eyes as I think about the amount of times I've wanted to just talk to someone after a long day at work. Where I wanted something more than TV and work. It's not lost on me that this might be the answer to a prayer I've whispered once or twice.
Picking up my cell, I see that I finally have a few bars of service. Immediate I log onto Instagram and head over to the Patterson account that I would've been in charge of. My stomach drops when I see that they've obviously used Brittany's idea.
