Page 52 of Lone Wolf in Lights
Jaxon stayed silent.
“I hear what you’re saying,” Gunner chimed in. “But I honestly don’t think you should beat yourself up about this.”
Eli’s hand clenched around the bottle. “This isn’t just about tonight. It’s about Miranda. About how her murder hollowed me out and filled the empty space with rage.” He spoke the words and they felt like glass in his throat. “Sometimes, I’m afraid I’ll never get free from it. That it’s just biding its time, waiting to consume me. And if it does...” His voice broke. “I don’t want that anywhere near anyone I care for.”
Jaxon stepped forward, placing a steady hand on Eli’s shoulder. “You won’t let it consume you. Because you’re stronger than that.”
Gunner nodded, his presence a solid reassurance in the uncertain dark. “And you’re not alone in this fight.”
Eli looked up into the starry sky and told them a truth they all couldn’t ignore. “I’m a bomb ready to explode, and I can’t avoid that. Not anymore.”
A long pause followed.
Until Jaxon snagged the bottle of whiskey and took the other seat beside Eli. “Well, it seems we won’t be able to solve this tonight. We might as well warm ourselves up.”
“Damn straight,” Gunner chimed in, reaching for his guitar and leaning back in his chair. He began strumming a tune.
Eli accepted the bottle from Jaxon and took a long swig before passing it on to Gunner, who paused his song to take a shot.
Then Eli did what he’d done many nights after Miranda’s murder. He let Gunner’s soothing voice and music take it far away from there.
Sunlight crept through the slits of the blinds as Willow’s eyelids fluttered open the next morning, a groan escaping her lips as consciousness forced her to acknowledge the day. Her head throbbed in sync with her heartbeat, each pulse echoing the confusion that had kept her tossing and turning throughout the night. She lay still for a moment, allowing the heaviness in her limbs to anchor her to the bed, hoping it might pull her back into the depths of sleep where she didn’t have to think about yesterday.
But reality wouldn’t leave her alone, and with a deep breath, she pushed herself upright and swung her legs over the mattress, settling her nightie back into place. Steeling herself, she made her way down the stairs to the living room. As she entered, the scent of freshly brewed coffee wafted toward her, a small comfort this morning.
When her last foot left the bottom stair, she found Amie, Charly and Aubrey were gathered around the coffee table and on the comfy living room couch full of mismatched throw pillows. Their faces, etched with concern and support, turned toward her as she approached. Amie’s eyes were soft with empathy. Charly’s nurturing warmth radiated from her. And Aubrey, with a reassuring smile that could break through the darkest days, sipped her coffee.
“Hey,” Willow managed, moving to the kitchen and fixing herself a coffee.
“Didn’t sleep great?” Charly called, as Willow headed back into the living room.
“Terrible,” Willow confessed, sinking into the plush embrace of the couch in the middle of Aubrey and Charly. She took a long sip from her mug, warmed by the familiar comfort. “How about all of you?”
Charly shrugged, gave a lopsided grin. “Jaxon called drunk in the middle of the night so that was fun.”
Aubrey rubbed her obvious tired eyes. “And I had to listen to him blab on about love and words that didn’t even belong together.”
“You shouldn’t have given up your room to me.” Amie laughed softly, sitting in the chair in the corner of the room, then said without the amusement, “I slept terrible too.”
Willow was aware that Jaxon and Gunner were most likely with Eli, which could explain why he was drunk. It was probably the same for all of them. She felt reassured knowing that Eli wasn’t alone last night; that was the last thing she wanted for him.
“I’m leaving for San Francisco,” Amie announced.
Willow finished her sip and lowered her mug. “Really?”
Amie nodded. “I booked a flight last night after talking to my mom. I need to be with family and...” She paused, as if the next words were lodged in her throat. “And away from Buck. From everything here.”
“I totally get that,” Willow breathed out, her voice thick with emotion. “You’ll be safe there with your family. It was the best thing for me after Niko to go somewhere familiar surrounded by love. You’ll finally be free.”
“Free,” Amie repeated, like testing what the word truly meant to her.
“San Francisco will give you the fresh start you deserve,” Willow continued, hugging the mug with her hands, embracing the warmth. “Away from him. You can heal, really heal.”
Amie nodded, a small smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “I hope so. I’m a little scared, but...it feels right.”
Willow held Amie’s gaze, her own smile radiating the pride that swelled in her chest. “Being scared doesn’t mean you’re not brave, you know? It means you’re human. And making this choice—that’s the bravest thing to do.”
“Thanks,” Amie said with a soft smile. Then she paused, her gaze holding Willow’s intently. “It may be none of my business, so just tell me to stuff it if you don’t want to talk about it, but why didn’t you talk with Eli last night?”
