Page 126 of When Stars Collide
“Probably a good idea,” I agreed. “See you soon.”
I closed the door, resisting the urge to repeatedly bang my forehead against it as it latched shut. Why I hadn’t used this opportunity to jump into his arms, I didn’t know.All I knew for certain was that my flight back to New York left tomorrow morning, and I wanted to tell Peter everything in person—I just didn’t know what everything was yet.
“Who was that?” Elle asked when I walked behind the screen.
“It was only Pet … er … Oh my!”
“What?” Elle looked herself up and down in the mirror. “Do I have something in my teeth?”
“Absolutely not. You look gorgeous.”
“Doesn’t she, though?” Kirsten clasped her hands together, admiring her handiwork.
I gaped at the vision standing before me in the dress I helped her choose, with her hair hanging down in waves just past her shoulders and her veil secured with bobby pins. She was a vision, a true princess. And her love story with Luke had been nothing short of a modern-day fairy tale.
“Mena, are you going to cry?” she asked.
“No … Maybe … Here.” I handed her the note from Luke.
Perplexed, Elle took the envelope and opened it, pulling out a letter I presumed was from Luke. She couldn’t have been more than a paragraph into it before her eyes began to well with tears.
“No crying!” Violet scolded Elle. “You’ll smear your makeup.”
“Yes, how dare you show any emotion on your wedding day.” I stood on my tiptoes to get a better view of the letter just as Elle finished it and promptly folded it up and stuck it back inside of the envelope. Heeding Violet’s advice, she grabbed a tissue and blotted her eyes. “If he’s already making you cry in a letter, just imagine what his vows are going to do to you. Hopefully, you brought your ‘A’ game for yours.”
All the color drained from Elle’s face and she looked like she was going to be sick.
“Or we could always drive a car off a cliff in the Grand Canyon.”
“Elle.” Alex came into the room, peeking behind the screen. “It’s time.”
*****
I didn’t know why I was so nervous; it’s not like I was the one getting married. Be that as it may, here I was, my stomach turning, my knees threatening to buckle at any given moment.
Because he’s waiting for you at the end of that aisle.
Yes, brain, I know, but he’s not waiting for me. Wait. Is he waiting for me? After the last couple of days, he probably believes our ship has sailed. How am I going to tell him? What am I going to do? There’s so much to say, so many decisions to make, and they all needed to be made soon.
Of course. That’s it.
It hit me then that this was just as much the beginning of my life as it was Luke and Elle’s. Except there was far more uncertainty when it came to Peter and me. Uncertainty was something I aimed to avoid at all costs. The unknown intimidated me, and now it was all that was laid out in front of me. Surely, this was the walk of anxiety.
Kirsten began her journey down the path leading to the aisle. After a ten second count, Violet commenced hers, which was a signal for me to take my position at the end of the cobblestone walkway. Drawing in a deep breath, I began my own count, clutching my bouquet of roses, lilies, and daisies in front of me.
8 … 9 … 10.
My foot took the first step down the walkway lined with dogwood trees. A light breeze blew through the branches, sending ivory flowers floating down to the cobblestones, creating something of a natural aisle runner. In conjunction with the late afternoon sun’s rays snaking their way through the branches, it was an image I wouldn’t soon forget. So pristine was it that I felt guilty for having to sully it with the heels of my shoes. The scene was magical, so fairy-tale-esque, that I didn’t want my walk to end and my anxiety to take over once more. But of course, it did end.
Before I knew it, I’d reached the beginning of the aisle, where Luke stood at the end, looking just as nervous as I felt. He perked up when he saw me, nodding with approval. As I knew they would, I found my eyes wandering away from Luke, landing on the man standing directly next to him. Our eyes locked at precisely the same moment, and we held our gaze right up until the moment I reached the end of the aisle to take my spot next to Violet.
I wished now that I would have told him about everything that happened between Phineas and me. Maybe then the glimmer of apprehension I saw on his face would have been replaced with all the passion, need, and unequivocal love I used to see whenever he looked at me. Perhaps then we could both be enjoying ourselves. Or maybe not. My uneasiness was so overwhelming I wished I had a bottle of Tums stowed away in my pocket.
Joyful murmurs broke out among the wedding guests, interrupting my thoughts, when Jackson walked down the aisle with the curly-haired flower girl. He looked every bit as dapper in his tuxedo as his father, projecting an aura of confidence that far exceeded his years. Also like his father, he was entirely undeterred by the people around him. He was transitioning into Peter more and more each day. Someday soon, he would be the same snide, awkward, yet incredibly sweet jerk I’d fallen in love with.
When Jackson reached the end of the aisle, I crouched down and held out my hand to him for a high five. All too eager, he happily obliged, slapping my palm with such gusto it elicited laughter from the audience. As he walked to stand next to Peter, I looked up to see Amanda smiling at me from her seat in the audience. This whole she and I getting along thing wasn’t exactly something I was going to get used to anytime soon, but with time, it would happen. It had to for Jackson’s sake.Next to Amanda sat Gwen Damsky, Mark’s wife and Alex’s mother. With her work schedule, it had been hard for her to make the journey down to Virginia, but I knew her attendance meant a lot to Elle.
Next to me, Luke gasped just as the chorus heralding Elle’s arrival began playing. At the end of the aisle, Elle stood with Tom on one side and Mark on the other. She walked slower than usual to accommodate Tom, who was doing all he could to maintain his stride. Tears formed in my eyes, just as they were forming in those of the other guests. From my peripheral vision, I noticed Luke rubbing his own eyes with the back of his hand.
