Page 109 of When Stars Collide
“How do you feel?”
“Desired. Appreciated.”
“Loved?”
I sighed. “I don’t know. We haven’t gotten that far yet. Maybe. I know I have strong feelings for him.”
“Stronger than your feelings for Monroe?”
I exhaled, my thoughts fluctuating between Peter and Phineas. “Honestly, I don’t know, and that scares the hell out of me.”
Elle chuckled. “Two hot, intelligent, insanely thoughtful and sweet men want you, and that scares you? Oh, whatever shall you do?”
“I’m happy you find such amusement in my dilemma.” I kicked my shoes off and laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “Yes, it does scare me, Elle. Because no matter what I do, someone is going to get hurt. And honestly, the thought of either Peter or Phineas getting hurt because of me and my actions tears me apart. Like you said, they’re both great.”
Elle wiped away the tear that was slowly sliding down the side of my face. “I’m supposed to be the emotional one.”
“How did you do it?”
She appeared confused at first, until it clicked inside of her head what I was talking about. “You mean between Eric and Luke? Well, it was kind of an easy decision to make when I came back home from visiting Luke in the hospital and found Eric in bed with his secretary.”
“You know your mind was made up long before then.”
Elle nodded. “Yes, it was. Honestly, a few days with Luke and I knew it was over with Eric. If I’m being honest, it was over with Eric long before I ever received the call from Candy after Luke’s accident. I just didn’t want to accept it. But in answer to your question, I guess I ultimately followed my heart. And that’s what you need to do.”
Elle’s advice was exactly what I would have given to her had our roles been reversed. It was good, sound advice. The safe advice any friend would impart. Except there was one problem. My heart was torn directly down the middle; one half belonging to Peter and the other half to Phineas. There was no following it. It was rooted, anchored by indecision and strife. Instead, my heart was waging an internal war, threatening to rip itself in half and leave me torn apart in the process.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“Since when do you like coffee? Better yet, since when do you wear turtlenecks?”
Jo looked up from her phone, startled. Since receiving her text summoning me to the cozy little coffee shop a block from our apartment, I’d wondered what was up. This wasn’t like Jo at all, awkwardly asking me to accompany her to such a subdued locale. Curious, I searched her face to see what I could glean, whether her expression gave anything away. It didn’t.I took a seat at the high-top table Jo had selected.
“I don’t know. I’m expanding my horizons, I guess. Can’t a girl try new things?” When she spoke, I caught something different in her voice—a nervousness.
“So, you’re trying men, then?”
“What? God, no,” she scoffed, genuinely disgusted.
An animated person by nature, she made exaggerated hand gestures when answering my question, revealing a small heart tattoo on her wrist. I smiled. The sight of that tattoo confirmed what I had suspected the content of this meeting would be about.
“Are you going to tell me why you brought me here, or make me play twenty questions?”
“Can’t a roommate just ask her other roomie out for coffee?”
I stared at her, my eyebrow raised.
“Okay, okay, you’re right. Put your brow down. Madison and I have been seeing each other exclusively for a couple months.”
“No!” I held my hand over my heart, feigning shock. “I’m all verklempt. What a total shock.”
Jo sighed, annoyed. “You can be such a dick sometimes, you know that?”
“I must say, I’ve been called many things before, but a dick is a first.”
“And it won’t be the last.” Jo took a cautious sip from her coffee as though testing it to make sure it had sufficiently cooled down to a more tolerable temperature before taking a sizable gulp. “I know I haven’t exactly been discreet since Madison and I started seeing each other.”
“Discretion really has never been your thing,” I agreed.
