Page 10 of Heart to Heart
I couldn’t even fathom the option that flashed through my head like some errant, fifty-thousand-dollar, Tristan-Tate-covered freight train to hell. It was preposterous, the thought that I would set foot on the set of any reality television show, let alone place near the top. Plus, imagine the time I would lose from work and the guaranteed minimum wage I could make in the time I would be gone filming.
But what if I did place? Fifty thousand dollars would all but ensure my parents could keep the house. It would be one less worry.
Despite knowing that the probability I was going to regret what was coming next was as high as Kiki and I had been the night we’d decided to stain a wooden chair we’d found at a local thrift store, I reluctantly picked up my phone and allowed my finger to hover over my favorite feisty roomate’s name before finally calling her.
“Avery, it’s before noon,” she answered on the first ring after I’d summoned the lady testicles to press the call button. “Why are you calling me before noon on the weekend?”
“Keeks,” I sighed, already regretting what I was about to say before it left my lips, “I need your help.”
CHAPTER 5
AVERY
“Cut.”
Frustrated, Kiki tossed her phone on the table, her hands shooting up to her forehead, where she furiously massaged her temples. “You know you have to actually say something, right? I mean, I’m all for the sultry, mysterious bedroom eyes thing, but your eyes look like they just caught sight of your parents doing it on the dining room table.”
“First, thanks for that visual right before bed. Secondly, can’t I just send in a written response with some photos or something?”
“Afraid not.” She picked up her phone and turned the screen so that I could see the official rules for applying toHeart to Heartspelled out in front of me.
Initial submissions had to be emailed no later than midnight tonight with a video of the prospective contestants describing what love meant to them. Who knew a show famous for backstabbing and over-the-top dramatic outbursts, once involving a woman brandishing a purple dildo, would ask its applicants to answer such a deep question? I was expecting to complete a questionnaire asking me for my favorite color andbra size and then calling it a day, not waxing eloquently about love for a show that sometimes felt to be the very antithesis of the word.
“This was a bad idea,” I groaned, resting my forehead against the table. “I’ll just have to sell a kidney. I’m sure it would be far less painful than this.”
“Livers fetch more on the black market.”
“I don’t want to know how you even know that.” I lifted my head back up to see Kiki still fiddling with her phone.
“A girl has to explore all her options.” She glanced up from its screen, eyebrows raised. “Are we doing this or not? Ethan’s coming over in about twenty. The Red Sox won, and you know he gets in a certain kind of way about his team from a city he’s never even visited.”
I shuddered. “Thanks for the warning and also for the reminder to never go to a game with the two of you.” Defeated, I slumped back in my chair. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s too soon for me to adequately answer that question. Guy ruined love for me. I don’t know what it is anymore.”
“We don’t talk about Guy,” Kiki shot back in a sing-song Disney princess voice, promptly following it up with a “no, no, no!”
“Cute.”
“I do my best.” She threw her long, jet black, Pantene-perfect hair, with newly dyed magenta tips, over her shoulder as she tapped the corner of her phone against her chin. “Look, perhaps we’re approaching this all wrong. Love doesn’t have to be romantic. It doesn’t have to be all reverse cowgirl with SportsCenter playing highlights of the game on repeat in the background. Love can be the love you have for your family. That kind of love can’t be tainted by some fickle asshole with an Austen complex. You see what I’m saying?”
“There was a lot to unpack there, but I think I can parse through it.”
Kiki smiled. “What you’re trying to do for your family, that’s love, Ave.”
I nodded through tears as I thought about everything my parents had done for me through the years, all the things they were still doing and missing out on in their lives for the sake of me and Josh. Guy had never been willing to make those kinds of compromises in his life; he had never been willing to bend, choosing instead to break me to spare himself the inconvenience.
So, I took a deep breath and searched my feelings, putting Guy completely aside as I let the words fly out. Not sure whether they made sense, but just hoping for something usable for the producers ofHeart to Heart.
“Love is putting others’ dreams ahead of your own, even if it means letting them shine while you stand on the sidelines, cheering them on. Love is knowing that sometimes you have to fall so that others can rise. It’s having each other’s back, making sure they know they’re not alone, that there’s always someone by their side regardless of whether they’re walking in the dark or toward the light.”
“Shit,” Kiki’s voice snapped me out of my reverie. “Where was that an hour and twenty percent of my battery life ago?”
“Do you think that works—did I answer the question?”
“Are you kidding me? I think you need to start packing your bags in three, two, one.” She tapped the screen on her phone, seemingly satisfied with herself. “Submitted.”
“Now we wait.” I exhaled a shaky breath, already regretting my decision in a confusing conflict of emotions. On the one hand, afraid of rejection and, on the other, of being chosen.
“My bestie is going to be onHeart to Heart,” Kiki squealed, covering her mouth with her hands.
