Page 81 of Huge Dynamite
This place will be spectacular when it’s finished. I only wish I could take Holly here for an inaugural drink. But, unfortunately, that’s not in the cards anymore.
Putting his beer down on the unfinished wood of the doorframe next to him, Colt takes a breath and then turns to me. “That gunshot surprised us all. We all thought it was you.”
“I know.”
“So? Why not tell her the truth?”
“Geez, you do get right to it, don’t you?”
“Seth, it’s been almost two weeks. I’ve been waiting for you to do something and go get her, but you haven’t. So, why don’t you tell her you didn’t kill that Dog?”
Looking into Colt’s eyes, I know he deserves the truth. “I don’t really know,” I explain. “I think it comes down to the idea that if you’re with someone—I don’t mean for a night or two, but really with them—you want them to get you. If Holly can believe I would kill a man and risk losing what we had—then maybe she’s not the woman I thought she was.”
“What chance did she have to think anything else? I was there, Seth. She was traumatized and yet she begged you not to kill that man, but you wouldn’t budge. You wouldn’t even give her a hint that you weren’t going to kill him.”
“I couldn’t very well announce that in a room full of Dogs, could I? They would have killed me on the spot. I had to get out.”
“So, you got out, and you should have gone straight to her to tell her. Instead, you’ve been sulking around like a damned wounded puppy. It’s been days and days. You could have told her any time.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“Of course it is.” Colt shakes his head and looks me in the eyes again. “Here’s the thing, Seth. You want to believe that you two are so different, it makes you the victim. You think because you’re not a doctor and don’t come from the upper class with an Ivy League diploma that she’s not into you. But all that woman did was try to show you how into you shewas. She was freaking kidnapped by the Dogs and never blamed you. Christ, Seth. She wasn’t some rich snob from the other side of the tracks, you know? This woman tried to be with you and your friends. More than anything, she tried to open a clinic to help people in need—and she had no one helpher.”
His words sit heavy in my gut. He’s right. About all of it. Why the hell am I being such chicken shit? “What about you?” Taking another long drink from my bottle, I turn to Colt. “Since you seem to know so much about women, anything ever happen with that girl we met? The drama teacher?”
“You mean Erica?” He smiles when he says her name. “Erica Peters. Yeah, we’ve been hanging out some.”
“I didn’t know.”
“You didn’t ask.” Sighing, Colt leans back and bends a knee, resting his foot on the edge of the foundation. “She’s coming by any minute.”
“Here?” Sitting up, I smile at him.
“Yeah. She’s good with plants. Going to help us out with some landscaping, and then I’m taking her to dinner.”
“Nice.” My hat is off to my kid brother. “Well done.”
Sitting up again, he stretches his arms overhead and then picks up his bottle and takes another long drink. He looks off at the trees for a moment and then turns back to me. “Do you think you would have killed him? If she hadn’t begged you not to?”
Shaking my head, I spin the bottle in my hands. Little bits of the cool, slick label come off in my palms. “I don’t know.”
Colt stares at the ground. “Want to know what I think?”
“Yeah.” I really do. It matters to me what my kid brother thinks.
“I think you use your dynamite personality to keep from getting close to anyone.”
It’s like a freaking bullet in my gut. “What the hell does that mean?”
“As long as you tell yourself you can’t be trusted, you have the excuse you need to never get close to anyone.”
A horn beeps and, turning, we see a car pull up. Colt looks up and waves. “That’s Erica. We’re going to the nursery, and then we’ll be back later.” Sliding forward on the foundation, he looks at the ground below and then jumps down. Wiping his hands on his jeans, he nods to me. “See you around, Seth.”
He rushes up to Erica’s little white convertible sports car. When she sees him, a giant smile spreads across her face. Hopping up in the driver’s seat, she leans across the car and plants a kiss on Colt’s lips. Damn. Scrubbing my face with my hand, I chuckle. Good for them. Glimpsing me, she glares at me before sitting back down. Damn, that girl and I did not get off on the right foot.
“What the hell is your problem with me?” I mutter under my breath.
As she pulls forward, Colt holds up his hand and waves at me. Watching the convertible pull away, all I can think about is Holly and sitting in the back of her convertible on the night she got her tattoo. My skin gets hot as hell and my jeans grow tight in response as I get an overwhelming urge to be with her. Like I do almost every night. And day.
