Page 173 of House of Payne
My heart is racing as I jolt awake. I lick my lips as my eyes dart around the room, wide and unfocused. Slowly, I run a hand over my face and blow out a deep breath. Then I let my hand fall to my side, and I blink, more of the room shifting into focus.
I notice a figure standing at the foot of my bed, still and unmoving.
I pull the covers up to my chin. “What are you doing?”
Mason shifts closer, his face half-hidden in the shadows. “I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“I’m fine.”
He moves around the side of the bed. My stomach dips when he stops in front of me and frowns. “I don’t think you are.”
I huff. “I know you like to play games with people and get inside their heads, but you can’t tell me how I feel. So, can you not?”
Mason kneels in front of me, and I notice his wrinkled clothing and unkempt hair. “I’m not telling you how to feel. I’m just…”
He trails off, and I sit up straighter, letting the covers fall. “You… are you worried about me?”
It feels ridiculous to say it out loud, but I have no other explanation for the way he’s acting.
Almost like he wants to hug me.
Mason frowns and shifts. “I don’t have the right to be—”
“I was worried about you,” I interrupt, the words pouring out of me in a rush. “I knew you were going to be okay, and they weren’t going to hurt you, but still.”
I have no idea why I’m telling him any of this when I swore I wouldn’t, but the air between us feels different, charged with some emotion I can’t identify.
Mason’s eyes sweep over my face and silence settles between us.
I blow out another breath, throw the covers off, and scoot closer. Then I surprise both of us by patting the space next to me on the bed and giving him a small smile. For the longest time, Mason crouches there, and I worry I’ve pushed too far. Abruptly, he straightens his back, kicks off his shoes, and sits down.
Gently, I wrap my arms around him from behind, and he softens.
“I don’t know how to do this,” Mason admits gruffly. “I’ve never… it’s never been like this for me.”
I swallow and hold him tighter. “Me too.”
Mason shifts, and I drop my arms when he turns to face me, a glimmer of something unfamiliar in his eyes. “Not even with Noah?”
I hold his gaze and shake my head. “Not even Noah. There has always been something here, and I didn’t know what it was.”
Until I met Mason, I didn’t even know it existed.
Mason’s stormy eyes move over me, wide and watchful. “When they took you, I wanted to burn everything to the ground. I would have, too.”
I search his face, and my breath hitches. “Mason, I can’t…wecan’t do this. I don’t know why you’re telling me this, but…”
Mason cups my face in his hands and draws his face closer. “I know. I know all the fucking reasons, London. I’ve spent the past few weeks reminding myself.”
“And?”
Mason traces my jaw and then moves his thumb to my lips. “I don’tgive a shit.”
I exhale, sharply. “Mason, I…”
He draws back to look at me. “So help me God. If you’re about to deny this, I will throw you over my knee and spank you.”
My lips turn up into a smile. “You really know how to talk to women, don’t you?”
