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“Who am I kidding? We both know I’m going to get stuck in that soul-sucking job, trapped under my dad’s thumb, living only to continue his stupid fucking legacy.” He sounds so defeated, like he’s already given up.
“Not necessarily. You have more freedom than you think.”
“Not everyone is you, Stella. Some of us have family, and responsibility, and people who depend on us. I can’t be selfish and flit off to whatever country I want and leave everyone behind.”
Ouch.
“You could travel with your music, find a different job, literally the world is your oyster, dude, but you refuse to see that! You could tell your parents to bugger off and never see them again, completely cut them off, but you arechoosingto remain attached to them instead of changing anything.”
“It’s not that simple, Stella,” he tries to interrupt, but I’m on a roll.
“Why are you shaming me simply for not being afraid to go after what I want? Why does that make me selfish? Why do I have to deny the things I want to make other people happy in order to be a good person? Your parents are horrible, evil people and you want to just bend over for them? For what?”
“For Nessa,” he grinds out.
“I respect that, I do, but I heard that voicemail. It sucks, but it means that this is no longer your responsibility to bear!”
“It can still be fixed,” he insists.
“But why should it? And why does it have to be you that does the fixing? Why do you need to be the one who controls everything, the one who has to give up on enjoying what you have in this life? Why do you refuse to make the most of it?”
“Because, Stella, some of us have to grow up and take care of the rest of you.”
“I knew it. You still see me as some idiot kid instead of a woman who knows what she wants.”
“Well, what do you want then?” He shouts.
“You, idiot! I want you! I’ve wanted you since the night I saw you play at the bar, since you first kissed me and looked at me like I meant something to you.”
“You did mean something to me!”
“That’s rich coming from the guy who won’t even listen when I tell him what’s going on right in front of him!”
“It’s not that simple, Stella. These are my parents.”
“I get that, but you still have a choice, James! You can create your own legacy. Live your own life!”
“Running away isn’t living, sunshine, trust me.”
“And staying here living someone else’s dream is?”
“You’d know all about living for someone else’s dreams.” He gestures to the postcards. “At least I’m doing this for someone who’s here to see the effort.” I can see the moment he regrets his words. I don’t care. I’m done.
“Get out.” My spine is ramrod straight as I point towards the door.
James sighs, leaning his head back and locking his fingers together behind it.
“Shit. Stella, just give me a sec here.”
“Out.”
“I’m sorry, I know I’m out of line, I just —”
“GET THE FUCK OUT!” My scream shocks both of us. He stares at me wide eyed, waiting for me to change my mind. I stand unwavering. “Whatever this was, it’s done.”
“Stella,” he croaks in dismay, anger giving way to pain.
“I can appreciate that you’re hurting, but you don’t get to talk to me this way.” I grab his hoodie from the back of the kitchen chair and shove it in his hands. “If there’s anything else here that belongs to you, I’ll make sure you get it.” I may not want to see him again, but I’m not a thief. He walks up to me and closes my fist around the sweater.
