Page 76 of Christmas Crisis
“I want to be in love with someone. Maybe it’s Stone. Maybe not. But I want what Marley has with James. What Maureen has with Will. I want to feel like I belong with someone. Mind and body.”
Leo’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “I want that for you too, Miranda.”
That night, I knocked on Leo’s door. For the past two months, I hadn’t stopped remembering how good it felt to be held in his arms.
He lifted the covers sleepily and sighed as I crawled in next to him. There was no need to overthink it. I enjoyed being close to him, and this was one of the few ways I could be. Hopefully, he didn’t feel like I was taking advantage, but I doubted it, since he seemed to like it too. The second my head hit the pillow, he emitted a little grunt and rolled over, pulling me back against his chest.
I'd missed the sense of security his firm grip provided.
On paper, it sounded insane. A bad melodrama. I was in a relationship with someone I barely saw, who was in a fakerelationship with a coworker, while they were cheered on by an unsuspecting public, and the thing that made me feel better was finding solace in the arms of my asexual best friend.
In the morning, I woke up to the feeling of—
Oh. My. God.
Ohmygod!
It was just like after the wedding. That was Leo.Again!
I froze.
“Mmm,” Leo mumbled, and the next thing I knew, he was pressing his lips to my neck. He was still sleeping, buthe was KISSING MY NECK!Asexual Leo. Leo the asexual. My friend Leo, who had no sexual interest in me. In anyone. His lips skimmed the bare skin of my shoulder, next to my sleep tank.Fuck! He smelled so good. And his lips were so soft.
Maybe he was having a dream? Did he have sexy dreams?
“Miranda,” his slumber-laced voice drawled.
Holy shit. Not only was he having some kind of sex dream but it was apparently quite specific.
Should I wake him up? He’d be embarrassed. But it didn’t feel right to just let him—Oh my god, he was full-on humping me now!
I widened the space between my legs instinctively when I felt him shove his sweats-clad knee in between. I held in a moan as I clamped down on his thick quad.
Bad Miranda! Do not ride his thigh! He doesn’t know what he’s doing!
His arm held firm around my waist, pressing me to him. Oh man. If I didn’t get a handle on this, he was going tofinish. And how would we ever come back from that? And how the hell was this happening?
Mustering my resolve, I rolled over quickly and put half a foot of space between us.
His movements stilled. I bit my lip as his eyes blinked open slowly. The dawn light filtered in through the curtains, shadows falling across his face.
“Miranda?” he rasped. “What—”
I saw the brief dart of panic in his eyes as he registered his hardness. He lurched forward, half lying on his stomach, trying to hide it.
He was about as subtle as an elephant, but I pretended not to notice.
“You okay?” he asked. “It’s early.”
Okay? No, I’m fully fucking not okay. You were just moaning my name and rubbing your massive hard-on up against me, and I’m freaking out.
“I’m good. A little congested. I don’t want to risk getting you sick, so I’m gonna head back into the guest room to catch a few more hours.”
“Okay,” he croaked, giving my arm a squeeze as I rose from the bed. “There’s sinus medication in the bathroom if you need it.”
I went into the bathroom and noisily opened the medicine cabinet, but all I brought with me to the guest room was a glass of water. I remained wide-awake, the nuclear sunrise painting mocking me, seeming a little too on the nose. Had I just blown up my entire friendship with Leo?
No. I could take this whole incident to my grave if I wanted to. Pretend it never happened. Just like last time. Both incidents could be my secret.
