Page 13 of The Biker's Second Chance
“Why did you not meet another man? I hate the thought of it, and it used to drive me wild with jealousy thinking about you being with someone else. But I also wanted you to be happy. I didn’t want you to be alone.”
She finishes her drink, and her cheeks have a pink flush to them.
“It was hard for me, Sean, when you left. I understand why you had to leave. I really do. These things come with club life. But that didn't make it any less painful. I didn’t want to risk my heart again.”
Something doesn’t add up. Plenty of people get their hearts broken. Gina’s a passionate woman. I can’t believe she wouldn’t want to find someone else, as much as I’m glad she didn’t.
“You always wanted babies, Gina, and it saddens me that you haven’t had that.”
She looks up at me sharply, and there’s pain behind her eyes. I put my hand gently on hers.
“Tell me what happened, love.”
I move my thumb, gently tracing the delicate lines of her hand and willing her to open up. After a few moments, she lets out a long sigh as if bracing herself. She looks me in the eye, and there’s sadness there, and pain.
“I was pregnant when you left, Sean.”
The words are like a shock wave to my heart. I can only gape at her, speechless.
“A few days after you left, I found out I was pregnant.”
I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut. Gina was pregnant, and I left her. The woman I love was pregnant, and I left. No wonder she hates me.
“Where's the baby?”
Gina shakes her head slowly, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes.
“I lost it, Sean. I miscarried. It bled right out of me.”
Miscarried. The word is like a concrete block pushing on my chest. She went through this without me.
I push the chair back and pace the room.
“Why did no one tell me?” My MC brothers should have told me something like this.
“Because nobody knew. There was so much going on at that time. Everyone was worried about you. The cops were harassing us, the Reapers were on our asses. I wasn't going to bother anyone with my problems.”
“Shit, Gina, I would have come back. I would never have left you alone with a baby.”
“You would have ended up inside.”
“I don’t care. I would have been there for you.”
She shakes her head sadly. “I know. That’s why I didn’t tell anyone. I was going to leave the club. Go away somewhere to have the baby. I knew if you knew about it, you’d come back for us. And that couldn’t happen.
“The bleeding started one night when I was working the bar downstairs. I kept having to run to the bathroom and watch our baby bleed out down the toilet. Knowing I couldn’t tell anyone, I stuffed a pad in my underwear and kept working. It was the worst night of my life.”
The thought of Gina going through that alone makes my whole body feel heavy. I sink to my knees in front of her, trembling. Hating the fact that I was oblivious to it all.
“Didn’t you tell anyone then, see a doctor?”
She shakes her head. “Women lose babies all the time, Sean. It was only about seven weeks along.”
What she’s telling me is devastating. The thought of Gina all alone and losing our baby makes my heart hurt in new ways.
“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you, Gina. I’m so sorry you went through that alone. How about any of the other girls? Did you tell any of them?”
“There was no one I was close to. I’d been so caught up with you that I didn’t have any female friends. I worked a lot because I was getting money together to run away, because I knew if anyone found out I was pregnant, they’d tell you and you’d come back for me.”
