Page 7 of A Secret Baby for Christmas
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CHLOE
Ithought I had prepared myself for seeing Mr. Porter again, but I wasn’t prepared for the shock waves of desire that raced through me when I saw his bulky frame standing in the doorway.
He’s even hotter than I remembered, and it was hard to tell my body to keep breathing.
After our one night of passion last Christmas, I freaked out. It felt so good in the moment, but then I went back to my bed and lay awake all night thinking about it. I seduced him. And at the time I felt powerful, but in the early hours of Boxing Day, I felt like a fool. He probably gets women throwing themselves at them all the time.
I packed my suitcase and left Allie a note and left their place before anyone was awake. A few days later, grand-mére got sick and I flew to France.
David texted me, and at first I thought he was just being kind. We messaged each other, and I thought maybe he did care about me.
Then my period was late. When I realized I was pregnant, I freaked out. I couldn’t tell him. He’s a grown man with a grown up daughter. There’s no way he’d want to go through all that again.
But for the past year, he’s been all I could think about. I had to come back, even if just to see him one more time.
But as the door closes behind him, I think I’ve made a mistake. I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t for him to head out as soon as I arrived with his son. Although it’s not like I’m making it clear the baby is his.
I don’t know how I’m going to approach this with Allie. I’ve thought about it so many times over the last year. There were so many times I wanted to call her, but what would I say?
“Hey, I hooked up with your dad and now I’m having his baby, but don’t tell him because I’m pretty sure he won’t want another baby at this time in his life?”
It’s one sure way to lose my best friend as well as the father of my child.
A cry from Hugo has my attention snapping to him. His face is screwed up, and his lips are opening and shutting in the telltale way they do when he’s hungry. “You ready for some milk?”
I carry him over to the couch and use a pillow to prop him on while I nurse.
Allie’s new boyfriend Hans doesn’t know where to look as Hugo latches onto my breast. Hans makes his excuses and heads to the kitchen to get lunch ready. I’m so used to popping my boobs out anywhere to nurse that I forget it makes some people uncomfortable.
“Why didn’t you tell me you’d, you know, had ababy?”
Allie tries to sound playful, but there’s real pain behind her eyes. I don’t blame her. I hated not telling her, but I didn’t know how to without dropping her father into the story.
Besides, I was embarrassed. Girls from families like ours don’t become teenage moms. At least that’s what Papa kept telling me in his disappointed voice.
“I didn’t know what you’d think of me.” Which is the truth. Allie’s always had a plan for a great career, and she’s always talked about how women should have their own ambitions. She got that from her mother. “I thought you might side with Papa in trying to convince me to give the baby up.”
Allie looks appalled. “Are you serious right now?” She’s hurt, and I feel bad that I didn’t trust her. “I’m your best friend, Chloe. I thought we told each other everything.”
“You didn’t tell me about Hans.”
In the last few minutes, she’s filled me in on how she secretly crushed on Hans for the last two years and never mentioned it to me.
She sighs. “Yeah, I guess that’s true.”
Hugo tugs on my breast as he nurses, and it’s comforting watching him drink my milk. My fingertips brush over his downy hair, and I smile at his little face.
“He’s adorable,” Allie says, her tone gentler.
“Yeah, he is.”
“Are you with the father?” she asks tentatively.
I take a while answering. I hate lying to my best friend. I thought maybe I could come back here and come clean, but she’s been through her own drama in the last few weeks, and I don’t want to add to it. Besides, I refused to put a father’s name on the birth certificate, so no one will ever know unless I choose to tell them.
“No,” I say. “It was a one night thing.”
