Page 31 of Wild Child
She twists the handles of her purse, and I know before she says anything that it’s because of me. Because I let this go too far, and now she feels like she has to leave.
“Don’t go because of me, Charlie. I’m not worth that.”
She gives me a sad smile. “It’s not you, Quentin.” She looks away when she says it. “I thought I might find something different on the mountain, but it’s time to move on. And Santa Cruz is right there. I can get on a bus and be back at Mom’s by morning.”
I stare at her, the girl who biked on her own across the country to get away from California.
“But your stuff, your bike…?”
She shrugs. “I’ll sell it to Mel. She’s looking for a bike.”
Mel is the most recent addition to the old ladies in our MC. The city girl had never been on a bike before she met Davis.
“But you love that bike.” I can’t comprehend how someone can decide on a whim to leave behind everything they own.
Charlie shrugs like it’s no big deal. “It’s only a bike. I’ll buy another.”
“But…” She can’t leave. Charlie only moved to the mountain when her dad got married last year. She’s got a job, and I thought she’d made friends on the mountain.
“How about your dad?”
“He’s got his new family to keep him busy. I’ll still visit, but we’re both adults.”
“At least come back and see him one more time and get your stuff, think about it for a bit.”
She laughs, but it’s a sad laugh. “I have thought about it, Quentin. I’ve thought about it all day. I hoped I’d find somewhere to belong on the mountain, but I was wrong. There’s nothing there for me. It’s time to move on. I’ve made my decision.”
She shoulders her purse and steps toward me. “Goodbye Quentin.” She kisses my cheek, and her breath sears my skin.
“But wait.” I grab her arm and our eyes lock. This is when I should tell her to stay. But the words don’t come. What can I say? That I can’t be with her, but I don’t want her to leave. Even I’m not that selfish.
She searches my face, but whatever it is she’s looking for she doesn’t find it.
I release her arm. “How will you get there.”
“There’s an overnight Greyhound that leaves from town in a few hours. By the time I wake up, I’ll be in Santa Cruz.”
A few hours. In a few hours she’ll be gone. “At least stay and have dinner.” My voice sounds desperate, but I’m not ready to let her go.
Charlie shakes her head. “I’ll grab a hotdog at the station.”
“But…” I step forward and she cocks her head expectantly, waiting for me to say something. But there’s nothing else to say. I can’t ask her to stay. I can’t offer her anything.
She smiles sadly. “I’ll see you around.”
Then she turns and walks aways. I watch her go, her thick boots crunching the gravel, her hips swaying and her shoulders back. The shock of pink hair bouncing with every determined step.
I watch the only woman I’ve ever had feelings for walk away.
But I need to let her go. Charlie will forget about me as she gets older. She’ll find someone else, someone who can give her what she needs. I can’t let my lust for her be a reason for her to stay.
It’s the right thing to do.
Then why does my heart feel like it’s had sixteen rounds fired into it?
17
QUENTIN
