Page 21 of Charlotte
“That’s enough Ace. What the hell is wrong with you? She has been through enough already.” Hawk rants as he comes to sit with me. He runs his hand through his hair in frustration.
“Hawk, he’s right. I haven’t been completely honest.” I say as I take a deep shuttering breath. “I feel like I am back there sometimes. I see, feel, and even smell the dirt floor. I hear them coming for me. I can feel their fists, their boots. I know what they are going to do. I am overtaken with fear. I haven’t been able to get myself back to reality. Only you have been able to bring me back.”
“I know you were out of it before when you woke. Has it happened before?” Hawk asks me.
“Yes, the night at the hospital when I told you I fell out of bed. I heard some men speaking Spanish in the hallway, then a bright light hit me. It was just like when I was captive. It was always so dark, but the bright light would blind me and then the pain would come. It happened over and over every day was the same. What if next time I can’t come back? I can’t live in that Hell. I would rather die.”
“That is not going to happen.” Straw declares firmly. “We are going to help you. The first step was admitting that you are having more than nightmares. Now we just have to help keep you grounded and prevent triggering flashbacks. Dr. Hancock can help you.”
“From what you have told us, a bright light seems to bring about the flashbacks. It happened at the hospital and again this afternoon. So, we keep a night light on in here. You need to make sure you stay with one of us at all times.” Wallace says.
“I know you won’t like this idea, but for your safety it needs to happen.” Deadeye says giving me a stern look. “You need to let us put some trackers on you, in your clothes and personal belongings. It might sound creepy, but if something happens when we aren’t around then we can still find you.”
“You want to chip me, like a dog?” I ask incredulously. “I can’t believe you are serious!”
“It’s not like that, love.” Hawk says quietly. “They wouldn’t be placed under your skin like an animal but would be placed in your clothing, jewelry, maybe your purse. We would be able to track you through your with it. Wolf told me how they used them to find Benny and his woman when they were abducted by a madman. It saved their lives.” I ponder on this for a moment.
“I need a little time to think about this, Ok? I’m not saying I won’t agree to it. I just need some time to think it through.” I tell the group of men. Seeing the concern and fear in their eyes, I know that I should trust them to do what is best for me. After all, they got me out of the Columbian jungle when no one even knew where I was. Still, it’s unnerving to think that my every move could be tracked.
As I am pondering the implications of wearing trackers, Tank speaks up. “Virus, have you heard anymore chatter on the net from the Lopez brothers?”
“Not anything new. The chatter is about the same. Everyone discussing where they think she could be hiding. Most think she has gone back to Kentucky, but there were posts today saying she couldn’t be there, or the press would be getting interviews.” Virus replies.
“Surprisingly these criminals are actually kind of smart.” Hack comments. “I’m surprised they could deduce something like that.” While I am thankful for the change in conversation, this is still not one I want to have. The guys continue to discuss the events of the day from my visitors to my freak out spell. By the time they have finished, I am feeling a little better. None of them have made me feel like I am crazy or a burden. After the deep conversation is over, the guys get up, gather their chairs, and head for the door. Hawk gets up to follow them out the door.
“I’ll be right back, love.” Hawk assures me as he follows them out into the main part of the house. I decide to head into the bathroom and get ready for the battle ahead that night has become for me. After brushing my teeth and washing my face I put on a tank top and shorts set. By the time I emerge from the bathroom, Hawk is sitting on the bed studying his hands. He looks up as I enter the room.
“Hey, love. You ready for bed?” Hawk asks quietly. I nod. He is afraid I am upset about the trackers. I should make him squirm a little after all that is a little creepy, but I just can’t. It is because he wants to keep me safe that he even mentioned it.
“Yeah, I’m ready.” I climb into my side of the bed. Hawk gets up and heads into the bathroom. He returns a little while later. I am already beginning to feel sleepy, but I want to assure him that I am not upset about the trackers, but the fact that I would even need one. Hawk leaves the bathroom light on and walks around the bed to climb in on his side of the bed. He lays on his back and remains quiet. After several minutes, I reach over and take his hand in mine. Turning my head to the right so I can look at him.
“Hawk, I will wear the trackers.” I whisper into the quiet of the night. “I’m not upset that you asked me to wear them, but I am upset that Ineedto wear them. I know that you are only trying to keep me safe. I appreciate that and I am thankful. I know it’s in my best interest. If I go off the rails or if Lopez gets his hands on me, you will be able to find me and reel me back to reality.”
Hawk just squeezes my hand. He turns to me and motions for me to turn over, so my back is to his front. It’s his and if I’m honest my favorite sleeping position. We lay there for a long time, before sleep comes. Both of us wondering what the night will bring.
Chapter 21
Hawk
Charlotte’s flashbackscared the shit out of me. What happens next time? What if I can’t bring her back to me? Can I handle having to put her in the hospital while we get her mind to a better place? I have never had to deal with anything like this. I feel so inadequate. I won’t give up on her no matter how hard this gets. I’m going to talk with Dr Hancock tomorrow at her therapy appointment. There has to be more we can do to help her.
She is consuming my every thought. I can’t stand the thoughts of being without this woman at my side. I am praying with all that I have, she doesn’t wake up and decide she wants to go back home to her children, job, and friends. I need her like I need air. She seems to feel the same. It’s in her eyes when she looks at me. She stares at me through her lashes. She tries to not let me see her staring, but I see the desire, wonder, and dare I hope love in her eyes. It’s too soon to be thinking she could be in love with me, but I know how I feel about her. There is love at first sight, right?
Holding her while she sleeps with her body curled into mine is what I love. We are touching from neck to toes. Her back is pressed into the muscles of my chest. Her body rises and falls with her steady breathing. My arm is laced over her waist and my hand is cupping her breast. I shouldn’t grope her while she sleeps but it’s like instinct for my hand to wander its way up her body and rest against the perfect globes. Her glorious ass is pressed hard against my groin. If I think about this too much, I’m going to be hard again.
She is going to be the death of me. My body craves hers. I need to touch, feel, and taste her essence. I am going to have terminal blue balls if this keeps up. I want to take her, but she is sleeping so peacefully. I don’t have the heart to wake her even to relive my discomfort. The nightmares will start again soon; I can wait, until she asks me to take her away again. She said I kept her sane during her torture, because she fantasied about me. She had dreamed of me making love to her, rescuing her, and saving her from the nightmare. So, when they come again, I will bring her dreams to life. I will love and worship her body so thoroughly the nightmares will leave, never to return.
The next morning after breakfast, the familiar sound of a Facetime call sounds from my phone. I ask Charlotte to sit with me while I take this call from home. It’s time she gets to meet my parents and my son. Swiping my phones screen to accept the call, I brace for the onslaught of my family.
“Hello!” I say as I look at the screen. My Dad’s smiling face greets me.
“Good morning, son. How are things going out there?” Dad inquires. “We hadn’t heard from you in a few days, just thought I would check in.”
“Good morning, Dad,” I smile at him through the phone. “Things are pretty good. I want you to meet someone. Say hi to Charlotte.” I turn the phone so that the camera is pointed at Charlotte.
“Hello, Charlotte. It’s nice to finally meet you. Jordan has told me lots of good things about you.” Dad is beaming through the phone. He can be quite the charmer when he wants to be.
“Hi, Mr. Jackson,” Charlotte’s blush is so cute. It’s endearing that a grown woman can blush at such a simple compliment. “It’s nice to meet you, too. Hawk has told me all about you, your wife, and Brian.”
