Page 46 of Hot Puck
“We want to move to Baton Rouge. Live with you,” Cassidy cries, her voice lower in volume but no less tear soaked.
I look at Chase.
“I told them about the offer to play for the Rogues. And your offer to move in with you.”
“That doesn’t explain the yelling and tears.”
“They want to pack now. Go tomorrow.”
Looking at the girls I want to cave to their demands, but I know I can’t. For one, it’s not my decision. And two, if they’re going to learn to stand up for themselves, to understand Chase is there for them no matter what—that I am too—they need to face the difficulties of today’s conflict.
“We can talk more about moving tomorrow.” I hold up a hand when Cassidy opens her mouth. “No, let me finish.”
Cassidy closes her mouth and I’m not ignorant of the way Crystal moves closer to her sister. They aren’t touching but each knows they have someone at their back.
“You need to deal with what happened today. You are not in the wrong. Although you should have said something to your brother about how you were being treated.”
“If you’d told me I would have done something before now, so you didn’t have to go through what you did today. Or any other day.”
“She just yelled at us. A lot.” Crystal’s eyes dart to Cassidy, but the look doesn’t stop her, the words just keep coming from Cassidy’s mouth. “Most of the time it’s okay. We have each other and a few of the other kids who we’ve been friends with since kindergarten.”
Emboldened by her sister, Crystal continues to explain why they didn’t mention anything to Chase. “We didn’t care about talking with anyone else. When we first went, it was only a few weeks after Mom and Dad and we kind of wanted to get away from the house,” she explains.
“Get away from the house?” Chase frowns at his sister’s words.
“Yeah.” Crystal looks at Cassidy before saying in a quiet murmur, “It hurts to be here.”
Chase
Well fuck!
It takes effort not to say the words out loud.
I promised myself I would stop swearing in front of the girls. I intend to stick to that promise no matter the circumstances.
But fuck, it’s hard.
If there ever was a situation that warranted swearing, it’s this one.
How did I miss the way the girls feel about being in this house?
Their home should make them feel safe—happy. It shouldn’t hurt.
The guilt swamping me sinks my stomach and drags my shoulders along with it. Slumping forward, elbows on the counter between us, I force words through my constricted throat.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
The girls look at each other before Cass answers. “We feel guilty about hating it here.”
“It’s okay to feel the hate. And the guilt. There are no rules to grief or the emotions you feel when you suffer from it.” Natalie’s voice is a soothing wave of comfort.
For all of us.
“I hate that you haven’t talked to me about it.”
“You never talk about hockey and before you talked about nothing else?” Cass throws out.
“Yeah. Okay. I should talk to you about how I’m feeling too.”
