Page 113 of Hot Puck
“You would have been fine without me.”
He eyes me. I can see the argument and brace for it, but he surprises me.
“You’re right. We would have been fine. Eventually. But this, the life we have here, is better than fine. It’s the best. It’s given all of us Hawkinses our greatest wishes.”
“I’m glad you and your sisters?—”
“I’m talking about all of us. You’re a Hawkins too. And now you’re making one.” He drops a hand from my face and presses it against my flat belly. “There’s a part of you and me in here, growing. Do you know how awe-inspiring that is?”
He shakes his head, his eyes sparkling with unshed tears.
“Gem. You came out of nowhere and handed me a dream I thought was dead. Now I’ve given you yours.”
“What?”
“A family. I already gave you a family and this baby is building on it.”
Oh.A smile curls my lips. His words are true. For as long as I can remember, I wanted a loving family. People at my side who loved me unconditionally, stood beside me when I made choices instead of telling me what they should be.
I got more than a star goalie for my NHL team when I went to St. Paul. I got three younger sisters. I got a friend turned husband turned lover. And now I have the one thing I wanted and believed would never happen.
A baby.
I thought Candace would be the only child I’d ever raise as my own. And I will raise her like my own. But this baby, the one Chase and I made in a moment of unexpected pleasure, would be the next piece of our patched together family.
“I’m going to change my name. Before next season, I’ll be Natalie Hawkins.”
The smile my words put on Chase’s mouth is blinding. “There you go again. Making all my dreams come true.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For loving me. I never expected to have this. With anyone. With you. When we agreed to marry for the girls’ protection, I thought the family we made would be it for me. Never dreamed I’d get to experience the love of a good man or have his baby.”
“I think I loved you from the minute I let you into our house. I can’t describe it or explain it but there was something there, something pulling me toward you, holding me in your orbit.”
“Chase.”
“It was your circle. The one you keep so few people in. You let me enter that sacred space and I told you once I would never let you regret that choice. I meant it then, I mean it now. Being with you, as co-parent, friend, husband in name only, was enough. But this, being your lover, getting to love you openly and having a baby together...”
He shakes his head again.
“Fuck, Gem. Holding the Cup doesn’t compare to what you’ve given me.”
I believe him. He might be young but he’s mature beyond his years. And when he loves, he loves with his whole heart, with everything in him. He gave up on the career he worked his whole life for because of the love he has for his sisters—his parents.
If what he feels for me and this baby is only a fraction of that, we’ll be two of the luckiest people in the world.
Chase
“I’m pregnant.”
Gem’s words from yesterday run on a loop in my head. And I’d be lying if I said the smile on my face is for all the people lining the streets of Baton Rouge. Or the Cup sitting in the first car of this motorcade.
Nope. The grin stretching my mouth so wide my cheeks hurt is because I’m having a baby with the woman I love.
My smile slips.
