Page 16 of A Little Christmas: Star
I looked forward to a time when I could be at Chained, or anywhere with him, and he could dress me from head to toe. He’d take his time undressing me like a favorite Christmas gift and then slowly redress me in my onesies or knee highs or short shorts. It would be intimate and sweet and help me slip into my little space.
But that was not for today. Today, I put my jammies on. I felt a little guilty at first, like I was maybe taking some of his job away from him. But this was so new to us, and this place was so new to me, and this was a big step as it was. Going that tiny bit further was too much too soon for me. It was sort of silly, given that he’d seen me naked plenty of times, but for whatever reason, at least for today, I couldn’t go there.
“I’m ready. What do you think?” I twirled around slowly.
“You look adorable.” He fished in his bag and pulled out a stuffed cat wearing a Christmas hat. No real cat would have allowed themselves to be decked out like that, which made it even more fun.
“Does he have a name, Daddy?” It wasn’t the first time that name had come out of my lips, but it felt different this time. Me being like this, where we were—it felt more real.
“You can name him whatever you want. He’s yours.”
“For keepsies, Daddy?” I hugged the cat close.
“For keepsies, Star. You should think of a good name for him.”
I slowly turned him around. He was soft and squishy but also a little bit realistic in his coloring. There was only one name he could have. “Santa Paws.”
“Perfect. Santa Paws, it is. Would you and Santa Paws like to go play?”
“Yes, Daddy!” I took his hand, and the two of us left the room. I followed Daddy’s lead to what I soon discovered was the little room.
I wasn’t sure what I expected. I had heard Miss Marion talk about what theirs was like and had seen some pictures of it, but that was a different club in a different city, and I’d been trying not to look too interested in it at the time, which meant I’d barely given them a glance.
There was something about coming into such a well-designed little space and seeing all the vibrant colors, the toys, and the different areas where you could read books or play with blocks or drive your race cars or do your crafts…it was like I’d been teleported to the North Pole, where all the toys were being tested out. And I got to be the tester. The Christmas tree, the hanging wreaths, and the sparkling holiday Christmas lights only added to that sense of wonder.
“What would you like to do first?” Daddy asked.
“Could we do…ooh, blocks?” I pretended like it was Santa Paws asking.
“Absolutely.”
I wanted to play blocks with others. I could build them all day long by myself, but there was something about knocking them over, building them up again, and knocking them over again when I had someone to play with that just made them a thousand times more fun.
I got lost in it, piling them one on top of another until they scattered across the floor, sometimes “accidentally,” sometimes pushing them over, other times pulling out the bottom block. I found new, creative ways to let them tumble. So did Santa Paws. With each one, I laughed and laughed as Daddy and I collected them and started over again.
Ms. Lily came in to let us know we didn’t have a ton of time left. I hated it but understood why. Daddy hadn’t rentedthe place for the entire day. I couldn’t pretend to fathom how much that would’ve cost. The members paid to have the space available to them, and it would have to be a ton of money to make it worth closing down for the night.
“Do you want to keep playing with blocks?” he asked. “We can. Nothing says we have to do anything else here.”
I looked around the room. “There’s so much here.”
“And it will still be here next time.” He gave my knee a squeeze.
“Next time? You would want to play with me again?”
He swept me into a hug, pulling me onto his lap. “I want to play with you every time.”
I sank into his embrace. We might not have a ton of time left in the little room and there was still a ton to explore. Still, I was quite content having the rest of our time here, being just like this.
The next thing I knew, his lips were on my forehead. “It’s time to wake up, Star. Wake up.”
I blinked. I wasted our precious minutes, asleep. Asleep in Daddy’s arms, but still asleep.
“Oh, my sweet boy doesn’t know that he fell asleep.”
I shook my head. “Is it time to go already?” I wasn’t ready to leave.
“It is. Let’s get you back and changed.” He slid me off of his lap, stood up, and held a hand out for me.
