Page 269 of Steeling Her
Once I get near the fencing, the fans all jump at the chance to get to me while the security guards rush down the aisle to protect me as best as they can. I grip the high barrier and pull myself up and over without a hitch in my step and land on both feet. I have to be very careful because cleats and concrete do not mix well. I don’t even take a second to rest or breathe, all I want is her. I start to climb up the stairs and call out for her to get her attention, but the crowd is too loud so I have to get closer to her.
“CARTER!” I yell over and over.
***
Carter
“Daddy won! Daddy won!” Taylor yells. She’s so happy with Chris and his performance. He’s going to be her hero for the night, but I know that the crowd along with my niece was more impressed by a certain someone who I think played the best game he’s ever played. It was beautiful to watch him. The fluid throws, the releases, and the leadership; he made it all look so easy. A true talent.
“Yeah, he did.” I smile back at her standing on the back of the seat in front of her to wave at her dad while Danielle holds tightly onto her. With the crowd up on their feet, I get swept away by the moment of celebrations for the team. They played so great. That was such a good game to be a part of; a memory to cherish.
I clap alongside the rowdy fans screaming and whistling at the team’s performance. Both teams played exceptionally well, but there can be only one winner. I’m glad it’s the Chargers.
I watch the guys talk to one another on the ground, exhausted by the game today. I don’t blame them, but it’s the way that Nick looks at me that catches my breath. A stare of an utterly unreadable emotion. Those gorgeous green eyes are fixed directly on me. I know he’s not looking at anyone else right now, I just know it. My heart leaps into my mouth due to a sudden light-headedness I feel from the look he’s sending me. My vision begins to get blurry.
“Hey, I need to get a drink. Do you want something?” I ask Danielle who is standing next to me and playing with Taylor.
“No, I’m good. Are you alright? You look a little pale,” Danielle asks as I reach for my bag.
“Yeah, I’m just going to get a soda. I think my blood sugar is just low. I’ll be right back, okay?” I say as I push past her and the people beside us. I excuse my way through the prongs of screams as I finally make it to the ascending steps and make my journey up. The yells get louder and louder as I make my way up to get myself to the bar.
It’s loud, but I still manage to hear my name. It makes me stop.
“CARTER!” I hear him. I listen as he gets closer and closer. The guards surround us to stop the fans from getting to him.
“Carter,” Nick calls out breathlessly. I’ve missed him saying my name so much—so, so much.
I can’t even lift my feet to turn around. Instead, I continue to face away and towards the bar ahead.
“Hey, it’s me.” With one touch on my hand, he tries to guide me around, but I can already feel the tears rushing down my face. “Carter,” he says just a hair’s breadth away from me now. I shut my eyes and relish in the feeling of having him near me. Chris is right, I need to be happy. I know letting this all go will allow me to start being happy.
“Please, turn around,” he begs me, and I finally do. Once he sees the tears running down my face, he cups his hands around my cheeks and wipes them as best as he can with his thumbs, catching the ones that are about to fall. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, a slight heartbreak in his tone. I know exactly what he’s talking about. He wouldn’t be here if he didn’t know.
“I didn’t know how to, Nick,” I confess. “I just didn’t know what to say.” It was hard. I truly didn’t know how to, but I knew that I most likely would have told him today. Yes, I am mad at Chris for spoiling it for me, but I’m always happy to have him hold me like this again.
Call me weak, but I’m so in love with this guy. I’ve buried it for five years. I just can’t keep it down any longer.
“I’m sorry, Carter. I’m so sorry for everything I’ve done to you.” I’m aware that everyone is watching us right now, but I feel like it’s only me and him; no audience, no fans. “If I could go back in time, I would—”
“You wouldn’t change anything, Nick. I understand why you made the decision. We were both so young, it was selfish of me to have assumed you would choose me over your career. I’m sorry about that too.” I grip my bag that’s across my nervous body right now. He’s always made me have those butterflies.
“I’m still sorry. I will forever be sorry for that choice I made—”
“I forgive you, I really do. Obviously, it wasn’t an ideal choice, but I understand it now. It’s time to forget this and let it go. We were so young, and we didn’t know what we were doing. I don’t want to hold this against you anymore. Now, it’s time to move on and to—”
“Fix it?” he finishes off with a huge smile.
“While it’s still there,” I whisper as I lean in to rest my forehead on his and shut my eyes. His smell is still as intoxicating as the first time I met him.
“I want you to know, Carter, I haven’t stopped loving you. I don’t think it will be possible to ever stop loving you,” he admits, making the tears continue to flow. Those words are the only words I ever wanted to hear him say.
“I’m exhausted from carrying our past around on my shoulders. I’m tired of going back and forth. I want peace.” I look up at him to stare into those hunter-green eyes I connected with first back at the college party when he sat on the end of a sofa, drinking beer. “The best thing we can do is learn from the mistake, not repeat it, and take things slow.” I nod and explain the best route for us to take as does he.
We don’t need to dive back into things for it all to blow up in our faces. I actually want things to work this time because I couldn’t imagine being with someone else from now on. I want to at least try again to see how things play out. We have grown into very different people from college, yet, part of us still remains the same, so it’s like it’ll be new for us, and I’m willing to venture into the new start. “Lets take things really slow, if that’s what you want?” I begin to realize I’m assuming he wants to get back together. It’s better to ask him.
“Agreed, lets start again and take it slow.” He softly smiles down at me. He licks his lips and stares deep into my eyes. “Is it okay if I kiss you now?” he asks for my permission. It takes me a moment to register that he asked. “I’ve been waiting for five years to do this.” He grins before licking his lips.
“Yeah.” I permit him and we lock lips. I remember everything. I kiss him like I had done before. A soft, sweet, and delicate kiss that has me melting into his arms as he removes them from my face and puts his hands around my waist. I put my own around his neck to shield us from prying eyes, but they see it anyway. We know this due to the wolf whistles and cheers from the people looking at us around the stadium and the country. I feel like I am on cloud nine. The kiss is still the same as I remember. The butterflies, the excitement, and the passion. It’s all still there, it never left.
