Page 17 of All I Want Is Love
No, like I told Barkley, I have to wing it.
“Do you think Soren will come tomorrow morning?” I ask Barkley when I drop into my bed.
Barkley raises his head and wags his tail.
“I mean, he said he would, and he didn’t message me to cancel. Though we didn’t really set a date, so does it count? I am going to set an alarm just to be safe.”
Barkley finally gets up from his place and drops down next to my bed.
“I guess I could message him to verify. But wouldn’t that be needy? I don’t want to be needy.”
Barkley grunts and turns on his back, stretching his paws.
“It’s different whenyouare needy. That’s cute. If I am needy, it’s pathetic. Besides, I never was. Fuck, Barkley, why am I overthinking everything nowadays!?”
Barkley snores quietly.
“Yeah, you are right. I should go to sleep.”
I feel exhausted, but not the usual kind of mental exhaustion I‘ve gotten used to. I am just tired from a day of shopping and running around like crazy. So tired that not even my intrusive thoughts keep me awake for too long.
seven
*LEO*
Soren sticks to his word and picks me up early in the morning before he has to go to work. And this time I am not an utter mess. I manage to look well put together and actually hold a conversation with him… somehow.
It’s still not as easy as it once was.
The rest of the day, I spend preparing the decorations for Aspen’s shop, cuddling with Barkley and spending time with Aspen.
On Friday evening, Robin successfully chases Aspen out of the shop and lets me have full rein on it without any disturbances. “Okay, how can I help!?” Robin exclaims.
“You could carry in the boxes,” I offer. “And then help me with your bookshelves. I want to do these first. Did you prepare the books I asked for?”
“Yes! I have one pile with Christmas-themed books for adults and one for kids.”
“I have made custom book covers out of the wrapping paper we bought. We can use the sparkling ones for the kids, and the gold-red ones for the adult books.”
Robin might not be the craftiest person, but he has endless energy and buzzes around me, doing whatever he can to help.
“Do you think Aspen will like it?” I ask him.
“He better does,” Robin says with a grin. “But seeing how you are the one doing it I doubt he will even utter a bad word.”
“I doubt that’s true,” I say. “It’s still his business. I am sure he wants it to look presentable.”
“You need to have more confidence,” Robin says. “Because what you did over the last three days is actually insane. Everything looks amazing. How many hours did you spend on this?”
“I didn’t work nonstop,” I say evasively, not wanting him to feel bad.
“Soren said you were dipped in glitter yesterday morning,” Robin teases.
I can’t help the twinge in my chest, not sure if it’s guilt or anxiety or even jealousy. “You talked to Soren about this?”
“Not really. But he had glitter on his jacket and then told me he met you before.”
I feel silly now for thinking they talk about me behind my back. Old habits die hard. “I didn’t sleep well,” I admit. “And got up early to spray some of the reindeer figures I made.”
