Page 80 of All I Want Is Love
Barkley jumps up and down in joy when we both come back inside, though I am not sure if I’d call it jumping. It’s probably more hopping, in a very adorable way. When we are back upstairs in the warm living room, Soren hugs me from behind. “I am sorry,” he says. “Robin was right, I should have talked to you instead of immediately jumping to conclusions.”
“You talked to Robin?”
“Like half an hour ago,” he admits.
I can’t help but chuckle. “Poor Robin. He got a flood of messages from me, too.”
“He mentioned something like that,” Soren admits before he pauses. “Can you forgive me?”
“Of course I can forgive you,” I say. “Don’t be that dramatic. Now, if you accused me of cheating or getting it on with Michael, I’d be really mad.”
“And now?”
“I am just a little mad,” I say, rubbing my eyes. “And tired.” I pause again. “And a bit hungry. After eating the whole evening, how is that even possible?”
“I am hungry too,” Soren says.
“Do you want to try the jam Aspen made?” I offer, deciding we really need something to eat after all the drama that just went down
“Do you have bread anywhere?” he asks.
“Yeah, Mrs. Bell gave me freshly baked sandwich bread yesterday.” I gesture at the drawer before leaving briefly to fetch one of the bottles of jam Aspen gave me. I wasn’t even aware he could do something like that. But then, he also owns a bakery, so I shouldn’t be surprised.
Still, I am.
I constantly am. It still feels embarrassing how little I know about my own brother, although I always loved him so much.
When I return to the kitchen, Soren has put out two plates for us and cut some slices of bread. There is also hot cocoa ready. I am so glad he is back to being my Soren.
We settle down in the living room, both munching on our bread in silence for a while. It’s good. Though good actually doesn’t even remotely describe it. The jam is fantastic. I definitely need to tell Aspen how much I loved it.
“I want to apologize once more,” Soren says into the silence. “I was being stupid.”
“I think Michael knew I would decline, but wanted to offer it anyway. It was an act of courtesy,” I pause. “Listen, Soren, there is no way I will ever return to that job. Fuck, even thinking about stepping one foot into the company building again makes me feel sick.” I shiver, pulling my sweater tighter around me. I feel cold and a tad bit disappointed. “Did you really think I would just leave without talking to you?”
“I went into panic mode,” Soren admits quietly. He puts his plate aside and slips closer to me to pull me into a hug. “I don’t truly believe that you would just leave and not talk to me. My mind just didn’t let me be rational.”
Unfortunately, I get this feeling. “There is a story behind this, isn’t there?” I ask. “Aspen and Robin hinted at it previously, and you mentioned a bad breakup, too. I didn’t want to push you for answers. But I have told you all about me, do you think it’s fair to keep this a secret from me when it clearly triggers your insecurities?”
“No,” Soren says quietly. “Okay, the ugly truth?”
I nod.
“It’s nothing too deep,” he says. “You know, a lot of people experience the same. My ex-boyfriend… we dated for years.Then he got a job offer, a really good one. First, he declined. I want to believe I didn’t push him, but I don’t know how he truly felt about it.” He pauses. “He was so unhappy, and he kept blaming me for it.”
“I can’t say for sure,” I mutter. “But I don’t believe you forced him to stay. Thisisyou we are talking about. I‘ll bet you looked up flight schedules, just to make sure you could visit him.”
“I did,” he says. “But I wasn’t enthusiastic about it. Long distance can only work for a while. Eventually, we’d need to make a decision.”
“So, what happened?”
“He got the same job offered again, and this time he took it. I made sure I was supportive. But he left within a few days. Before he did, we got engaged.”
“Wait… you were engaged?” I ask, stunned.
“Yeah, but not for long.” He shrugs. “Being long-distance was hard, but I hung in there. It is doable, you know? One day, I had my assistant take over for me and decided to surprise him with a visit.”
Something about the way he says it, tells me that said surprise didn’t end well. “It’s sweet,” I say quietly. “That you wanted to do that. What happened?”
