Page 34 of Drown Like Heaven
It wasn’t even that I couldn’t hear his name. I could. I had to hear it all the time.
Just notnow.
Not when I wasn’t expecting it.
“Please don’t be sad,” Mila said again, tears glossing her own eyes now.
“I’m okay.” I tried to take a deep breath, but the air was too hot, and the lighting was too dark, and the music was too loud. “I need to go to the bathroom.”
“Can I come with you?”
She wasn’t grabbing me anymore, only linking her pinkie finger with mine. She knew I liked that, even while she was shitfaced.Fuck, thinking about Mila made me want to cry all over again. I loved her so damn much. She didn’t even know the rock she’d been for me.
“Yes, come with me.”
We made our way slowly to the bathroom, where only two people were in line—miraculously.
When it was our turn, Mila and I went into a stall together. I could barely see it was so dark, but the darkness was nice, in a way. I was safely locked in a stall, my spine pressed against something solid and cool, the music muted, and the only person in front of me was Mila. I tipped my head back to rest on the wall, staring up at the ceiling while I tried to get a hold of myself.
“I’m sorry,” I breathed. The thrumming of the bass almost swallowed my words, but I knew Mila heard them. She heard me when no one else did. “Today was already weird.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not really, no. I’m too drunk to try and have a real conversation right now.”
“So am I.” She giggled. “But I’ll always try for you. I can be anything you like, Kota. Even sober. Ty moya malen’kaya luna. Moy zayka.”
“I have no idea what you’re saying. And I don’t want you to be sober.” I looked down at her, bliss starting to pull in my veins again. We were almost the same height, but the platform boots gave me a couple inches. “I really, really want to fuck my professor, though.”
Mila screamed. Like, full volume.
“I fucking knewwwww it. Iknewit. Do it for me.”
I couldn’t stop myself from laughing as I shook my head. “It’s never going to happen.”
“Maybe. Never say never. Never-ever say that. Never-ever-ever, babe. You don’t know.”
“He doesn’t like me. And I don’t want to be suspended, so.”
“Then be sneaky. Duh.”
I smacked my palm on my forehead. “Duh! Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Shut that cute little mouth,” she scolded, reaching for my lips while I frantically turned my head away. I had no idea what sort of men she’d been touching tonight. “Let’s go back out there. Yeah?”
“Yes.” I promptly unlocked the bathroom door and opened it right as Mila yanked her dress up and her thong down. “Mila!” I slammed it shut, sliding the lock back into place. “I didn’t know you were going to go pee!”
“You know now.” She was faintly bobbing her head to the music that muffled through the walls. “I’m almost done.”
“Okay. Well…Let me know.”
“Done.” She stood up and the toilet automatically flushed behind her as I re-opened the door. We both washed our hands, then headed into the madness once again. Bathroom gospel; I was born again.
Good.
Time to get even more fucked up.
Chapter 11
