Page 14 of Lessons in Love
I walked away from Manhattan. I walked away from the girls who I was dating because they fit an image I was trying to uphold, but had no depth. I walked away from my parent’s pride in my accomplishments and took on their worry that I would be homeless. They didn’t realize the size of my bank account, the money I’d earned off the hard work of others while I bet theirs on the stock market. It had paid off. It was legal, but certain investments made me feel dirty. The clients were thrilled with their profits, but I only felt a sense of loss. That was when I left the life I’d been living behind, donated what I call my dirty wealth to charities that my mom helped me find. I took everything else and put it into the bar to start over. I soldmy apartment with the great view in a trendy part of the city for millions and invested the rest. My financial advisor says I’m set for life.
As I step into the shower, I drench my hair and let the water run down my body. I spent three years living a life that destroyed my insides. I’ve spent the last three building a life that’s good, feels clean, and honorable. So I have sex with some of the ladies—no harm done if it’s between two adults who understand the rules.
Virginia has me feeling reflective for some reason. I’m not worried about her. Rule number two is intact for all time. If I learned anything from my boss’s ex-wife, it was don’t ever fall in love. I don’t need the baggage of relationships. Life should be simple, easy, uncomplicated.
The problem I’m now faced with is if I really believe life should be that easy, that uncomplicated, and that simple, then why am I still thinking about a girl I met on a random Monday at the bar? A girl who was never a Gimlet and always a Paloma. Yep, I called it all wrong last night and I’m starting to wonder if my heart is the one that will pay the price.
Chapter Six
When I reach for the door, I notice there’s a smudge on the gold lettering of Hardy. I rub my elbow over it using the soft material of my coat to make it shine again. “There. Much better.” Yeah, yeah, I talk to myself sometimes. Whatever. I’m damn proud of this bar and that my name’s the one on that smudgy door.
When I walk inside, the happy hour crowd is in full swing, every table occupied. I stop by the far end of the bar when I see Clive. “How’s it going?”
His smile grows. I’ve seen that one before. He’s either just gotten laid or about to hone in on his prey. “Picking up.” Despite the old man name, he’s one of my biggest earners. The ladies love him. I’m six two. He’s twenty-five and built like a beast at six five.
“Business or you?”
“Ha! You know me well. Little honey-colored sweet bee over by the dartboard.”
I look behind me. A pretty woman with a sincere laugh is pulling a dart out of the wall. He always did like the doe-eyed blondes. “Twenty-one?”
“Don’t worry. I carded. Twenty-three last week.”
Nodding my approval, I reply, “Good.” Pushing off the bar, I head to the back. “Eddie will be here soon, but you know where to find me if you need anything.”
“You working behind the bar tonight, boss?”
“Trying to catch up on the books for last week.”
“We’ve got the front covered.”
“I have no doubt.” I greet a few ladies on the way back. The hall is quiet, my office quieter when I unlock the door. The dry erase board is the first thing I see when I enter—smeared ink where Const—Virginia’s hair rubbed against it when I rubbed against her. Damn, she was beautiful with her lips parted, her breath becoming mine, and her pussy vibrating around my fingers.
That same memory inspired me to get off another time in the shower this morning. I should be mad at her, offended she treated our time together less than respectful like I had. But I didn’t just have a good time with her; I had a good time getting to know her. It would have been nice to have more time with her. Asshole put an end to that. He had some nerve showing up to collect her like he owns her. And what the fuck? Was she drunk enough to fall right into his hands after I warmed her up? I sit down at my desk and switch on the lamp. I need to bury myself in some numbers instead of burying my thoughts into her deep heat.
Rubbing my eyes, I glance at my watch. Two hours. The nightly transition has happened and the night crowd is growing. My mind drifts. I hate unsettled feelings and that’s what I have from last night. And this morning. She was a virgin and yet, she went home with him and what? Banged him. I don’t regret not having sex with her. It goes back to respect—I respect her so it’s hard to hate her. We all make mistakes. So maybe if she comes around again I’ll give her another chance.
I doubt she will, but it helps to ease the little bit of guilt I’ve carried over from bailing from that cab this morning. Now that I’m caught up with last week’s inventory and balanced the books, I stand, looking in the mirror behind the desk and straighten my tie. I don’t have a uniform here, but the guys tend to dress nicer. Keeps the clientele happy and helps project a more upscale ambiance. Yeah, yeah, we hook up sometimes, but we’re single, so it’s all-good.
I turn out the lamp and leave the office. Making my way through the tables and full bar reminds me again of how fortunate I am. I worked for this, gave up my past life in hopes of something better. The hours are long, but so were the hours at my last job. At least this one comes with perks.
“Hi, Hardy.”
Seeing one of my favorite margarita drinkers, I stop and swing around the back of her chair to kiss her on the cheek. “Hi Margot. Good to see you.”
“Better seeing you. Now give me a spin and let me get the full view.”
I’m tempted. She’s good in bed. She’s also married. Now. I’ll clarify that she wasn’t when we hooked up last year. Her being married means she’s off-limits now. I may live by two rules, but I make the guys adhere to that one. The last thing I need or the bar needs is an angry husband out for revenge. Anyway, ever since I ran into my ex-boss’s ex-wife, I keep things in my life less muddied. I kiss Margot on the cheek and make sure she’s good with her current drink before checking in with Eddie and Clive.
Just five feet from the bar, I stop. I know that midnight hair, lean legs, and another damn suit that does nothing to flatter her figure. Oh wait, maybe I do approve of the suits. Clive gives me a look along with a little head nod toward Virginia.
I feel the tension in my jaw as I walk around the bar. When I see what she’s drinking, it lifts just a little. She looks up andgives me an uneasy smile that looks out of place on her. I’m not all bad. I head down to break the pressure before it builds. Her glass has just gone empty and she pushes it forward. Standing in front of her, I ask, “Would you like another Paloma?”
“Are you making it?”
“Making and Shaking.”
Even I know how lame that line is, but she laughs. “Then I’ll take two.”
