“We had a plan and we executed it.” Knowing that was a cryptic reply, he was fully prepared for her to grit her teeth and howl with rage. He was betting if he was standing closer to her right now, she would’ve just cracked him over the head with that stick.
“Right.” That clipped reply came with a stiff nod that clearly said shedidn’t believe him. “You said we were going to talk to Montoy to see what he knew about Duncan. You told me it had to be done that way because Theo had some type of tenuous truce with the vampire.”
“We already knew he was working with Duncan. Asking Montoy the question wasn’t going to move the needle on this assignment. We had to get in, take a look at their headquarters for any signs thatthey were closer to getting to this army, and let him know we aren’t playing games.”
“Signs? Did you think he was gonna have a map sitting on the table for us to take a look at? Dammit, Aiken, you couldn’t have told me about this plan when you were eating your grilled cheese sandwich at the Diner? You treated me like I was a newbie, ordering me to keep my eyes open, focus and all that bullshit,when all you had to do was tell me what the plan was and I could’ve helped.”
Years ago he would’ve shared his full plan with her, because back then they were in perfect sync. Their human parts were in love and the beasts had just begun their Selection, and it was perfect. Now, Aiken had no clue what was going on. “How were you going to help, Mel?” It was a question he knew would piss her off,but it had to be asked because it was the simple truth. “If you’re not willing to shift and stand with us in the fight, how the hell do you plan to help? Because that’s what this boils down to, the fight. Montoy and his crew have their plan and we have ours, so either we get to that burial site before them or we all lose. That’s how this works.”
“No!” She slammed the stick down on the pooltable and it snapped in two. They both stared at it for a couple seconds before she dropped the end she was still holding and came around the side of the table, stopping only a few feet from where he sat. “I took you to Riya, possibly putting her life in danger, because you needed to learn more about him. I’m staying here playing pool and eating meals with a bunch of dragons when we both know I’drather be anywhere else, and you lie to me. Is that where we are now? Is that what we are to each other?”
“Oh no you don’t.” Fury rose in his gut and he stood. “You don’t get to throw ‘us’ up in my face when it’s convenient, Mel. When you refuse to accept what’s between us, between the beasts that live inside us, on every other day of the year.” How dare she try that bullshit when he was stilltrying to recover from the moments she’d stood still while fire burned all around her. He’d had only seconds to shift and scoop her onto his back before a burning tree slammed to the ground where she’d stood.
His greatest fear had been, what if he wasn’t fast enough. His body still quaked with the tornado of emotions that had ripped through him in those moments. Now that she was still breathingand yelling at him like all of this was his fault, anger moved alongside the fear. It took a couple steadying breaths before he could settle his thoughts and still the beast’s trembling.
“You’ve got a right to be angry,” he admitted and did another slow inhale and exhale. “I should’ve shared the full plan with you. That’s what partners do.” And once upon a time she’d been the best partnerhe’d ever had. “I’m sorry for not trusting you.”
The weary look in her eyes as she glared at him suggested she wasn’t going to accept the apology. He couldn’t really blame her if she didn’t. “I’m not the enemy here, Aiken. I’m trying to do my part.”
“I know you are. I also know how difficult being a part of this, considering all that’s between us, must be.” Dealing with this clash of personaland professional was something he knew neither of them had ever faced before. So far it was a battle they both seemed to be losing.
Now she was shaking her head as if trying to get a grasp on all the conflicts around them. “This ends right here at this moment. Either you’re up front with me from here on out, including me in the whole plan to get Duncan, or none of this works. I’ll pack mybags and walk away right now.”
She would. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that he’d blink and she’d be gone, possibly for another eighty years. He didn’t want to lose her, but the past eight decades without her had taught him one thing—he couldn’t lose what he’d never really had.
He dropped his arms to his sides. “We wanted to make a point. Killing as many of them as we could at one timewas a big point.”
“That’s why you scorched the house?”
“Montoy pushed my buttons. That wasn’t part of the plan but I’m guessing we’ll have to deal with the fallout from it anyway. The plan was if Duncan didn’t show his face during the meeting—which we weren’t counting on—to make a fuss and get them to chase us. Lure them out into the forest, away from human population and scorch them all.If Duncan could assemble a group to hunt us, we could burn down a group to let him know what they’re up against. If we can’t figure out another way to stop them, we’ll kill every vampire on this realm before they can get to those ancients.”
He stopped, took a deep breath and continued, “My personal goal was to force your beast to take control, to snap you out of this denial you’ve chosen tolive in. It was wrong and I apologize. Unfortunately, by the time my brain caught up with my wants, it was too late to change that part of the plan.”
There was a long tortuous pause before a flash of resolution crossed her face. She stuffed both hands in her back pants pockets and tilted her head. “Tell me dead witches weren’t part of this plan.”
“Of course not.” A little offended thatshe’d even think he would be part of something like that, he frowned. “That was a surprise, so when Isla called me, I told her to let the others know. Bleu spoke to Theo and he gave the go-ahead to continue with the meeting and the burning afterward. But you found proof that Duncan, or at the very least the Royal Blood, were at Natalia’s shop, so that gave us even more motive to get in and do asmuch damage as possible.”
“All of this you could’ve just told me. And the personal part—” She shook her head. “I’ve tried so many times to explain why all this is a problem for me, why I can’t... I’m just so pissed with you right now, Aiken! I could grab another one of those sticks and bust you in the head.”
And he wouldn’t blame her. He’d been acting like an ass since the moment he’dsensed her in that townhouse. The usually calm and cool Drakon he was known as was thrown off-kilter and he hated it. He closed the space between them, knowing that touching her right now was a risk. There was no doubt she was angry and he was pretty sure she’d do just what she said and crack him over the head with a pool stick if she wanted to. But she hadn’t. That fact gave him just a slither ofhope.
He reached for her hand, rubbing his thumb lightly over her fingers when she didn’t yank it away. “I’m sorry,” he said again. “I’ll get on my knees and apologize or stand at the top of this mountain to yell it, I’m so sorry for not listening to you and for not trying harder to understand what you’re going through. It was never my intention to hurt you in any way, Mel. Never.”
Herfingers remained still in his grasp while their gazes locked in what felt like a battle for his life. Was she going to forgive him? What was he going to do if she didn’t? Did he even deserve her forgiveness? He gritted his teeth with the many questions without answers, the weight of his fault in the demise of their relationship, the vamps, dead witches, all of it pounded against his temples untilhe wanted to yell out in agony.
“I’m not like you, Aiken. That’s what I need you to understand.” That wasn’t what he wanted to hear but when she eased her hand out of his grasp, he let her go. “I’m not like any of you and I’m fine with that. Why can’t you be okay with it too?”
Exhausted, confused and embarrassed at being such an idiot, he dragged his hands down his face. “Not shiftingtonight almost got you killed, but that’s my fault. I take full ownership of the fact that I pulled you into that situation expecting a different outcome and I shouldn’t have.” He turned away from her then, had to stop looking at her. The undeniable pain of his love and fear for her was pushing him to a place he’d never gone before and he needed to find his control.
“The stakes are high here,Mel. Much higher than they’ve ever been before and I’m just trying to keep it all in perspective.” With a shake of his head he turned slowly, until he faced her once more. “Innocent humans are being killed or changed into killers, the streets of this city are marred with their blood nightly. If we don’t stop them, this will be the new normal, until all the realms are filled with only those likethem. And even with all that going on, you walk back into my life and my heart does this thing again.” He slammed a hand to his chest as if that action could possibly explain what he’d been feeling since seeing her again. “You’re not the only one fighting against your beast here. My powers are acting crazy and I’m trying to do the right thing by you and save the realms.”
“Did you think aboutmy life when you made this plan with your little clan members? Did you give one ounce of thought to the fact that I’d never been anything other than a human my entire life. No claws, no sharp teeth, no coughing up fire the way you did at Montoy’s place. That’s not me, Aiken. It’s you.” Her words may have been spoken quietly, but there was no mistaking the pain lacing each one.
Closing hiseyes tightly he lowered his head. Of course she’d been hesitant to shift. She’d never done it before. Again, he reminded himself how much of an ass he’d been, even if it was for a good reason. And now here she was, reminding him once again that he should respect her decision.
When he lifted his head seconds later, it was to her arms now folded over her chest, her gaze more exhausted than angry.“I can’t go back and stop myself from saying all those things to you, or to accept you as you are sooner. All I can do now is tell you how sorry I am for everything and to promise you it’ll never happen again.” A slight movement at the base of his spine signaled the beast’s disagreement, but Aiken ignored it. He took a step closer to her again. “I hope you forgive me, but I’ll have to live withit if you don’t.”
“We never used to disagree this much,” she told him. “Not before you told me about becoming a dragon.”
Shaking his head, he continued to close the distance between them. “I don’t want to fight with you anymore about that.”
She dropped her arms to her sides and he paused, not sure if that was a defensive move on her part or not. “I don’t want to fight with you either.”
He was just about to breathe a sigh of relief, to count this argument as over and suggest they go to bed when she blinked and her eyes changed from their normal topaz brown, to a luminescent gold that mirrored his reflection as he stared at them.