Page 100 of Seeds of Christmas
His face goes through several expressions—shock, anger, hurt. Then it shutters closed.
“You’ve changed,” he says coldly. “Andnotfor the better.”
I open my mouth to apologize—because that’s what I do, what I’ve always done—and then I stop.
I have changed.
“Yeah,” I say. “I have.”
Matthew waits, like he’s expecting the rest. The apology, the backtracking, the self-doubt.
I don’t give it to him.
“What is it? You seriously thinkyoucan do better?” His voice rises, anger bleeding through. “You think that guy in there is going to want you long-term? You’re too uptight, too controlling. I put up with it because I loved you, but?—”
“Get out.” My voice is ice. “Get out of my house. Now.”
He takes a step toward me, his face flushed with anger, and I hear movement from the kitchen.
“Matthew. Leave.Now. Or I’ll call the police.”
For a long moment, he just stares at me, his chest heaving.
He stares at me like I’m a stranger.
Maybe I am.
Then he grabs his keys from the coffee table with enough force to make them jingle. “Your mother is going to be so upset. You’ll break her heart.”
“I’ll call her myself,” I say. “I’m done with you speaking for me.”
He starts toward the door, then stops, looking back at me one more time. And for a second—just a second—I see the boy I fell for three years ago. The one who made me laugh before he made me cry. The one who was sweet.
But that boy is long gone. If he ever really existed at all.
He doesn’t respond. Just walks out, slamming the door hard the frame rattles.
The silence that follows is deafening.
I’m shaking. Actually shaking. My legs feel weak, and my hands won’t stop trembling.
I stand there, shaking but standing, as Carter appears in the doorway.
“You okay?”
I nod slowly, my hands still trembling. “Yeah. I am.”
“Rhi.” Carter’s arms are around me immediately.
“I did it,” I whisper. “I actually did it.”
“You did.” He pulls back to look at me, and his eyes are bright with pride.
“I thought I was going to throw up.”
“But you didn’t. You stood up for yourself. You told him the truth.” He cups my face in his hands. “I am so proud of you.”
I start laughing, and then I’m crying, and then I’m doing both at the same time while Carter holds me.
