Page 116 of Seeds of Christmas
And suddenly, I’m tired of it. Tired of pretending. Tired of everyone walking on eggshells.
“You know what I miss most about Dom?” I say, and every head turns to me. “The way he used to narrate everything like it was a nature documentary. Remember that?”
Marcus blinks, surprised. “Oh my god, yes. Especially during parties.”
“‘Here we observe the common frat bro in his natural habitat,’” I do my best Dominic impression, and it’s terrible, but a few guys laugh. “‘Note the aggressive posturing. The elaborate mating rituals.’”
“He did that during my date once,” Tyler says, warming up. “I brought this girl back here, and Dom just started following us around narrating. ‘The male approaches cautiously. He offers the female a beverage. Will she accept? The tension builds.’”
“She did not accept,” Connor adds. “She left.”
“Because Dominic wouldn’t stop!” Tyler’s laughing now, though, not angry. “But it was so fucking funny.”
“Remember when he convinced the whole house to do that charity 5K?” Marcus shakes his head. “And he showed up in a full banana costume?”
“And ran the entire thing in it,” I finish. “In August. In ninety-degree heat. He was so sweaty at the end that the costume was transparent.”
The guys are all laughing now, and it feels good. Natural. Not forced or careful.
“God, I miss that idiot,” Marcus says quietly, and the laughter fades but doesn’t disappear completely.
“Yeah,” I say. “Me too.”
“He was the best friend I could have asked for,” Marcus continues. “When I was going through that breakup sophomore year, he sat up with me until three in the morning just listening.”
“That was Dom,” Connor agrees. “He was just... there for people.”
“Remember when he organized that whole thing for Professor Straub?” someone else chimes in. “When her husband died? He got the whole house to make meals for her for like two months.”
“And he hand-delivered them,” Jake adds. “Every week. Rain or shine.”
“He was really good,” I say, and my voice cracks slightly. “Like, genuinely good. Not just nice. Good.”
Rhi squeezes my hand, and I squeeze back.
We stand there andthisis what I’ve been missing. Not avoiding the pain, but sharing it. Remembering Dominic together. Letting him be more than just the hole he left behind.
“You know what?” I say. “I’ve been avoiding this house because I thought it would hurt too much. Being here without him. But, actually, it feels good. Talking about him. Remembering the stupid shit he did.”
“He did a lot of stupid shit,” Tyler agrees.
“So much stupid shit,” Connor adds.
“Like that time he tried to cook Thanksgiving dinner for the whole house and almost poisoned us,” someone says.
“Or when he decided to learn guitar and played ‘Wonderwall’ badly for six months straight.”
“‘Anyway, here’s Wonderwall,’” Marcus imitates, and we all groan in unison.
The stories keep coming. Some funny, some sweet, all of them Dominic. And with each one, I feel a little lighter. A little less like I’m drowning in his absence and a little more like I’m celebrating who he was.
Rhi’s been quiet this whole time, just standing next to me, but her presence is like an anchor.
After a while, Jake checks his phone. “Ten minutes to midnight.”
“Shit, really?” Tyler straightens up. “I need to find my girlfriend.”
The group starts to disperse, heading inside for the countdown. But Marcus stays behind, pulling me aside.
