Page 58 of Always to Remember
“Because they’re children, and if I had been blessed with children, it would break my heart to think they were going to bed hungry.”
Helen picked up a ginger cookie and took a bite. “I’ll, think on it.”
“The twins have such big brown eyes—”
“All right. I’ll talk to him. He just hates Clay—” She stopped herself with a groan. Not saying Clay’s name was a game they began when the war started because women weren’t supposed to care about politics or talk about war. “He just hates him so much, he made his decision without thinking how it would affect the others.”
“I’m sure Lucian would be agreeable to an arrangement. He seems to dislike his brother as much as we do.”
“I can’t say I blame him.” Helen shoved the rest of the cookie into her mouth. “The men have stopped working. Guess we’d best see to filling their plates.”
Looking toward the barn, Meg watched the men wander toward the makeshift tables, which had been set within the shade of the trees to provide some respite from the heat. They’d eat. Then they’d nap or go to the river, waiting for the day’s heat to pass. They’d finish the barn in the late afternoon.
From the corner of her eye, she watched Clay walk to his wagon, where he’d find no shade.
Isolated.
Alone.
How simple it would be to prepare him a plate and walk to the wagon to give it to him.
How difficult to step into his world of loneliness.
Clay liked bluebonnets because they were well suited to carving. Any thick twig, with the gentle application of his knife, could become the delicate stalk with the dainty petals.
“Damned hot today!” Dr. Martin barked.
Shooting off the back of the wagon, Clay pressed his hand to his chest, trying to calm the rapid thudding of his heart.
“Where were you, boy?” Dr. Martin asked.
Clay grinned. “Lost in my thoughts, I guess.” He held out his hand. “Thanks for walking over.”
Dr. Martin shook his hand before dropping onto the back of the wagon. Clay sat beside him. “People aren’t gonna like that you’re over here talking to me.”
Dr. Martin withdrew an apple from his pocket and held it toward Clay. “You keep people well, they don’t mind what you do, and I’ve kept most of these people well.”
Clay took the apple and brought it to his nose, inhaling deeply. So sweet. He and the twins had already eaten the food they’d brought from home, but their meal hadn’t included anything this sweet. With his carving knife, he cut the apple in two. “Joe! Josh!”
The boys stopped their game of leapfrog and rushed over. “Dr. Martin brought you an apple.”
Grins filled their faces as they took the offering. “Thanks, Dr. Martin,” they said before running off. “They’re good boys,” Dr. Martin said. “Yes, sir, they are.”
“What were you thinking before I disturbed you?”
Picking up the small branch, Clay started whittling again. “Trying to figure out when walking away isn’t running.”
“Thinking of heading home before the barn’s finished?”
Clay peered over at the doctor. “No, sir. Thinking of heading a little farther than that.”
“Away from Cedar Grove?”
“Yes, sir. I’m beginning to see that Lucian was right. I didn’t realize the hatred ran so deep. I don’t like it touching the twins. It’s one thing for people to avoid me. I made my choice and was willing to accept the consequences. My brothers shouldn’t have to suffer because of it.”
Dr. Martin sighed. “I never cottoned to hatred, never understood the way it flowed or how to dam it up.”
Clay held out the flower he finished whittling. “You can give this to your girl.”
