Page 38 of Always to Remember
The older woman touched a gnarled finger to Meg’s cheek. “Ah, child, memories don’t upset me. They’re all I have in my winter years to keep me warm.” She trailed her finger along Kirk’s likeness. “I can almost see his freckles. Kirk hated them so, and Clayton knew it, but he still put the shadow of them here. He always carves what he sees. Honest to a fault that boy is. Did you notice the freckles?”
Meg smiled. “No, ma’am, I guess I didn’t look that closely.”
“It’s just a little difference in the shading. Over the years, Clayton has become skilled at carving. When he was a boy, he’d bring me things and ask me to guess what they were. Got to the point where I hated to guess. I said a cloud once, and it was a pig. Nearly broke his heart. Not that he’d let me know that, of course, but his eyes don’t just see more than most. They also tell more than most. But you gotta look closely. Have you looked closely, Meg?”
“I try not to look at him at all. I hate him and all he stands for.”
“You said that too strongly.”
“Because my hatred for him is strong.”
“Or is it not strong enough? You accepted his gift—”
“I only took it because he didn’t want it, and I thought you might like to have it. I certainly don’t want it.”
“But it’s a likeness of Kirk when he was a boy.”
Standing, Meg held up her hands to emphasize her point. “He made it. I can’t keep it.”
Mama Warner leaned back in her rocker. “But you’ve asked him to make you a monument.”
Meg walked to the window and gazed at the flowers Nature had created, trying to ignore the flowers that a boy had made. “That’s different. The monument isn’t for me specifically. It’s to serve as punishment for him, and it’ll serve as a memorial for the others.”
She heard the gentle creaking of the rocking chair. Sometimes, she wished she were small enough to crawl onto Mama Warner’s lap as she rocked. She glanced over her shoulder and watched the older woman slowly touch every line and curve of the carving.
“I’d say Kirk was about twelve when he looked like this,” Mama Warner said.
Returning to the woman’s side, Meg placed her hand over one disfigured by years of fighting to survive. “That’s what he said.”
“He? Will you not even say his name to me?”
“Speaking his name sickens me.”
“And yet you plan to spend the coming days in his company.”
“So I can witness his suffering.”
“Revenge has a way of turning on itself, sweet Meg.” Mama Warner gently touched the tip of her finger to a tear that clung tenaciously to Meg’s eyelash. “Are you not the one who will suffer?”
Roughly, Meg swiped the tear away. “I made the mistake of asking him about Kirk. In the future, I won’t speak to him at all.”
“In silence you’ll watch him work? Sometimes, silence can be so very loud. Remember how you cried when Kirk’s mother wouldn’t talk to you?”
“Which is why I know it’ll be an additional punishment for him.”
“You feel strongly about this, don’t you?”
“Yes, ma’am. They were all so young, so brave, filled with conviction. They were men of honor. He betrayed them when he didn’t stand by them.”
“And you think he’ll come to recognize his failings as he works on this monument?”
“If he doesn’t, he will by the time he’s carved every name into stone. He’ll have to face each man’s memory again.”
“And when he’s finished?”
“Then we’ll have a tribute to those who gave their lives for the Cause.”
“A tribute steeped in revenge. It’ll be interesting to see if this monument will become what you envision, to see how deeply your punishment will cut into his soul. Will you bring me my box?”
