Page 87 of She Tempts the Duke
All the things he’d worried over, she turned into insignificance. Theirs might not have been a love match, but it was based on a deep and abiding friendship. More than some had.
“What did you do, all these years, while I was away?” he asked.
She gave him an impish smile, released a small laugh which echoed between them and lit upon him as lightly as a butterfly. Only it didn’t stop there. It knocked at the edge of his soul, but he had learned that he needed to remain hardened to soft things so he forbade his soul from answering.
“What do you find so humorous?” he asked.
“Not humorous. Encouraging. It’s the first time you’ve asked me about the life I led while you were gone. I’ve had a thousand questions, wanted to know what happened during every moment of your time away from here. I wasn’t even certain that I warranted so much as an afterthought.”
He furrowed his brow, clenched his jaw. Surely he’d asked after her welfare. Something. But nothing came to mind. Yet she’d married him anyway. Thank God for scandal. “I was occupied with thoughts of securing Pembrook and my titles.”
She gazed up at the sky as though she was seeking rain. “Yes, I know.”
“You say that as though you don’t approve.”
She pursed her lips, adjusted the reins.
“Mary?” he prodded.
With a long sigh and obvious reluctance, she said, “It’s only that you seem not to allow much more in your life.”
“Because nothing is more important. It has always served as my lodestar, given purpose to my life.”
“Perhaps now that you’ve secured it you can expand your interests.”
“I still have much work to do. I need to review ledgers, journals, and discover exactly what Uncle has done the past twelve years.”
“Why can you not simply start with now and move forward?”
He shook his head, not certain why he was so bothered that she found fault with his methods. She was his wife. Her place was in his bed, not in his study. “As the daughter of an earl, you should realize that history is all-important. We must understand the past in order to meet with success in the future. Besides, there is a small chance that I will find something that will prove correct my suspicions about his murdering my father, or allow me the opportunity to ruin his life further.”
She was quiet for several moments, and he wondered if he should apologize for his terse tone. If he did, he’d begin a habit that would no doubt leave him apologizing most of the day. He longed for the easy camaraderie they’d possessed as children. Only they were no longer children.
“I read,” she finally said.
“Pardon?”
“What I did while I was at the nunnery. I read the Bible. I scrubbed floors. I stitched a thousand articles of clothing.” Her laughter this time echoed sadness. “Or it seemed like a thousand anyway. I hate stitching, by the way. I have no intention of ever again threading a single needle.”
“We have the means for you to hire servants to thread needles for you.”
Finally, he had cajoled a smile from her.
“I’d rather hire them to rub my feet. I’m very fond of having my feet rubbed.”
“I shall keep that in mind. Although I much prefer having other things rubbed.”
“Sebastian, don’t be naughty.”
“I just thought you should know. You should also know that you were never an afterthought. I simply never thought of you as growing up.”
“Just because I’ve grown up doesn’t mean I can’t still outride you.” She urged her horse into a gallop.
He watched her go. A time had existed when he knew exactly how much of a lead to give her and how to pace his horse so that she would win. Always he had been able to deny her so little. Why did he feel that he was suddenly denying her far too much?
He spurred his own horse on. They were adjusting to new roles—husband and wife. And years of changing between them. She was no longer the young girl whose braid he’d liked to tug on. He was no longer the boy who had expected to step into his father’s boots with barely a ripple in his life.
He had weathered numerous storms to get here. His brothers had suffered as well. He couldn’t forget the price they’d all paid.
