Page 65 of His Captive
She’s broken and that’s my fault. I take off my suit jacket, toss it on the chair, and remove my tie before pulling the covers back. She didn’t even get dressed today, but while the sight of her naked body is enough to make my cock twitch, I’m more worried about her.
“I’m sorry, Lea,” I sigh, getting into bed and pulling her into my arms.
“Stop apologizing, please,” she mutters. “It doesn’t matter how sorry you are if you won’t do anything to change it.”
“I know,” I relent, unable to offer much else.
We lay in the darkness, the silence saying everything. She’s silently pleading for me to do something to stop what is going to happen. I’m silently explaining why I can’t, while she silently berates me for being such a damn fool—I don’t think she would actually berate me, but she should. I deserve every bit of her anger and frustration.
I’m the one who allowed this to go too far. I’m the one who gave in. She’s a victim of all of this. Her only crime was meeting a man and daring to let the island guide her toward one misadventure after another. Despite what I said last night, none of this is her fault. I’ll shoulder that blame all the way to the end.
“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you’ve still got your entire life ahead of you,bambina,” I whisper, trying to comfort her the best that I can. “You’re going to leave this island, and it’s going to hurt for a while, but one day… one day, it’ll pass. I’ll be a memory you look back on, and I hope one of those times, you’re looking back on it from a happy place. Hopefully surrounded by children and a loving husb?—”
“Don’t.” She cuts me off. “Like you said, I don’t want to hear it, so please don’t say it. Don’t romanticize the rest of my life because it makesyoufeel better. What makes you think it’ll be that easy for me, hmm? It wasn’t easy for you.”
“That’s different, Lea,” I sigh.
“How?” she questions with a sniffle. “Love is love, Massimo. The years might make it stronger. A baby certainly does. But once the spark is lit, it’s lit. Except this time, you don’t have to suffer after it’s over. I get to do that alone. Or maybe I won’t be alone.” She grabs my hand and moves it to her stomach. “Maybe you left me something to remember you by.”
“Lea!” I say, pulling my hand away. “You’re not pregnant.”
“How do you know?” she asks, sniffling again. “We didn’t do anything to prevent it, did we? And Istillfeel you inside me.”
“Yeah, but…” My words trail off and I sit up. “Aren’t you on birth control?”
“Why would I be on birth control?” She turns to face me, and I see the tears glistening in her gorgeous green eyes. “I wasn’t running around trying to lose my v-card every chance I got.”
“You didn’t say anything, so I… I assumed,” I mutter, shaking my head. “Damn it, I should have worn a condom.”
“I really don’t care, Massimo,” she sighs, looking up at the ceiling. “If I’m pregnant, I’m pregnant. At least my life will finally have some direction, if that’s the case.”
I want to tell her she’ll be taken care of, regardless. That if our spark created life, she’ll be able to give our child a life she never dreamed of. But I can’t do that. It’ll just upset her more than she already is, because I’m leaving something for her, after she told me not to.
“If you are… it doesn’t change anything,” I say, unable to hide the pain that the thought brings.
“I didn’t say it to change your mind,” she says. “I’ve been staring at the wall all day, trying to come up with something. Anything, really. I’ve given up on that. I know you won’t do anything to stop it, and I certainly can’t. So, just hold me. At least give me that.”
I swallow hard and nod as I lean against the pillow. Lea scoots into my arms and I wrap her in a tight embrace. Listening to her sniffles while her tears run down my chest is heartbreaking. I wasn’t sure if anyone would cry for me after I’m gone. Now I know there will be two eyes that don’t stay dry.
So I’ll hold her.
Because my arms, while there is still blood pumping through them, are all I have to offer.
CHAPTER 28
Lea
I’m broken in Massimo’s arms.
Totally shattered.
I don’t really think I’m pregnant. There’s no way to know for sure, but it’s just one of a million thoughts that passed through my head while I stared at the wall. None of them felt like they would sway him. I doubt he’d be swayed if my belly was swollen with undeniable proof of the love we shared.
The only thing in my foreseeable future is pain, and not the kind that makes me wet. This pain is going to ache in an entirely different way. I sampled that pain after my grandmother died. But I had a lifetime of memories, and it was her time. I understood she wouldn’t live forever.
Massimo’s time isn’t up. It’s so far from up, thehitmanoffered a way out. An easy way out for a man like Massimo. Easy in all the ways that don’t matter—impossible in the ways that do.
After crying myself into a state of exhaustion, I fall asleep in Massimo’s strong arms. I wake up in them hours later, with the sun seeping through the windows. I struggle not to cry. It’s Friday. The best day of the week, most of the time. Except this is my last day with him.
