Page 29 of Disabling Relics for Dummies
Chapter22
Ravyn
Iwas nervous about calling Key. I wanted him here, and he just fit in so well with Killian and me. I broke my rule about getting involved with coworkers with Valentine, and it hadn’t worked out that great for me. Key was fucking brilliant. He’d make an amazing consultant for my museum when this was over. Key had a home somewhere, and he had mentioned nothing about loving this town so much, he wanted to uproot and move here.
Key picked up on the first ring.
“I’m epically bored. Save me before I get arrested again.”
“What did you get arrested for the first time?” I asked.
“I was bored, and some people overreacted. They could never make the charges stick.”
“Well, we can’t have you getting arrested now, can we? Want to come over and get drunk with us while translating a deranged cult’s grimoire?”
“That depends. Are you going to get kinky when you think I’m not paying attention and do birth control magic literally right next to me?”
I had just taken a sip of my tea when he said that and spat it right at Killian. I joked I hoped he noticed, but now that I knew he had, I wanted to crawl up my own asshole and die. I could hear him laughing as I choked on my tea.
“I’m all about safe sex, Ravyn. I hope you put it to use and had a good time. I’d love to come. Unfortunately, I’m a hangry drunk, so we’ll probably have to order a big greasy pizza later. Do you need me to bring anything?”
“Just that sexy ass of yours.”
Fuck. Why did I say that? I pretty much said shit like that to men all the time before my dick exile, but never people I worked with. You had to have a twisted sense of humor to work at any of the Profane buildings. The buildings were all haunted as fuck. Ripley’s ghosts were mostly well behaved, but some of her books bit. It took a special kind of crazy to teach eighteen-year-olds who just had their magic awakened at the Academy of the Profane. The vampires were the only ones who had been living with everything since they were kids. Students went a little nuts.
Then, there was my museum. The spirits on these grounds liked to prank us when they weren’t having fun with academy students. We had some ancient dildos the board liked to pretend were something else that always ended up in someone’s coffee cup if they didn’t use one with a lid. We had cameras everywhere and knew damned well it was ghosts trying to flavor people’s coffee with ancient vaginas.
Our interior designer, who had been here forever and staged our exhibits, got a coffee mug from her grandkids every Yule. She was the only one of us who hadn’t switched to lidded tumblers for coffee or tea. She repeatedly said she refused to negotiate with terrorists every time she fished a dildo out of her coffee.
We made inappropriate jokes among the staff all the time because of some of the things housed in this museum, and it was just who we were, but we never got sexual. Sasha and Graham were my only employees dating each other, and no one even knew until they pulled me aside and asked my permission for a work relationship. Everyone knew now, but even they weren’t as obvious as what I just said to Key.
“I like this side of you. You should do it more often. Don’t let that stupid wolf suppress you anymore.”
“Sorry, that was totally inappropriate.”
“Why? Iknowmy ass is sexy. You should touch it. It’s nice and firm too.”
“Just get over here.”
Key laughed.
“Will do, but it’s your day off, young witch. Work rules don’t apply.”
Key liked this side of me, and I rather liked this side of him. I had a feeling everyone at my cottage tonight was going to find translating the grimoire a little sexy, and we were going to be drinking.
I was in so much trouble.
Chapter23
Ravyn
Ithought I was mentally prepared for this until Key knocked on my front door. He usually dressed impeccably at the museum, and this fucker showed up at my place ingray fucking sweatpantsand a tight black T-shirt. That was just playing dirty.
Killian wasn’t much better. He lookedgloriousin baggy black jeans with chains and a black muscle shirt. My resolve was weakening. How had I sworn off men for so long? Oh, yeah. I hadn’t met any as fascinating as Key, and Killian was stuck as a bat before.
Key thrust a bottle at me before I let him inside. I looked down at the label, and my eyes bugged out of my head. There was a pack of shifters in Ireland who had been making whiskey forever. There were limited batches, and it had a cult following. It was nearly impossible to get a bottle of this whiskey. People put their names on the waiting list and ended up dying before they got a bottle. And supernaturals lived much longer than humans.
“How in actual fuck did you manage to snag this?”
