Page 20 of Gatling
Like hell I would just walk away. His Appalachian accent was thicker than I'd ever heard it before. That meant he was too stressed to hide it.
“Aren’t you tired of shutting everyone out?” I demanded, with more heat to my voice than I’d intended.
Ryker was silent. I knew this side of him very well. He slammed that proverbial door closed, and no one would be able to pry a word from him.
“There are people who care about you, Ryker.” I circled around the kitchen table, coming to stand in front of him.
He still wouldn’t look at me.
I shoved him in the shoulder. At last, he dragged his gaze away from the window to pin me with a heartbreaking, dull stare.
There was no sign of the Ryker I knew in that look. Just a soldier, sworn to do his duty. Just a hunter, waiting for trespassers in his territory.
A sob lodged in my throat. I stepped closer and cupped his face in my hands.
Ryker flinched, pressing himself back against the wall even harder in an attempt to escape me. His body was stiff and that dead-eyed gaze remained locked in place. He kept his arms straight at his sides, hands balled into fists.
“I wish I could get inside your head,” I whispered.
Ryker’s chest heaved as he stared down at me with heavy-lidded eyes.
“Thank God you can’t,” he replied, his voice hoarse.
As I began to withdraw, Ryker caught my hands, turning my palms up. He traced the lines in my palm, caressed each finger.
“Every time I fire a gun,” he said, tapping his temple. “It gets bad up here.”
My heart ached in sympathy. Noah would get nightmares sometimes, replaying memories from his military days. He didn’t go into detail, but he was willing to let me distract him. He said it helped.
Ryker wasn’t like that though. He pushed everyone away and disappeared to deal with whatever he was going through on his own.
Before I realized what I was doing, I rose up on tiptoe and kissed his temple.
Ryker’s breath hitched. He curved his hand around my hip, gliding his thumb under the hem of my borrowed hoodie. When his skin made contact with mine, I bit my tongue to stifle a needy whimper. He smoothed his palm down to cup my ass, pulling me flush against his body.
Holy shit, this was really happening.
I brought my lips to within an inch of kissing his mouth. Then…
“Stop,” he said through his teeth.
“But—”
“Leave, Kelsie.” Ryker’s voice was like iron, cutting straight through me.
He pushed me back and turned his head away. Shame burned my cheeks. I wavered on the spot as tears stung my eyes.
I spun on my heel and fled to the bedroom, crawling under the covers. I almost kissed him—my brother’s best friend. And the way he had touched me—grabbed me. Greedy. Wanting.
A persistent throb pulsed between my thighs. I curled up on my side, biting the pillow to stifle my frustration. How would I be able to face him after this? How could we look each other in the eyes, knowing that we had touched each other like that…but never acted on it any further?
It seemed as if an eternity passed before the whine of the door’s hinges cut through the silence. I lifted my head to see Ryker standing on the threshold, broad shoulders filling the frame. A tall, dark shadow amid the other shadows.
Just as I took a breath to speak, Ryker beat me to it.
“I’m not here.”
“It looks like—”
