Page 34 of Honey, Honey
My smile faltered. I still hadn’t told her the truth. I wasn’t sure if I would, because how did you bring that up? Everything seemed more tangled now that Law had played along for the night. My phone buzzed with another text from Tiffany and I tabled my thoughts.
‘You think on my offer to come work with me?’
Shit. The other big thing from last night.
‘Kind of. Still thinking.’ I sent back, because at least I was telling the truth there. I was still thinking about it. Still didn’t know what I wanted to do when it came to putting down more roots in New York. You’d think after a decade that it would come easier to me, but it didn’t. My little relationship blowing up with Christian hadn’t helped...and thinking about him when a permanent job was being offered wasn’t exactly doing wonders for my decision making.
‘BOO! Okay, fine, I’m not gonna nag but I love you and want you to come work with me. I’ll drop it though. What are you doing tonight?’
My belly tightened. Yet, another secret I would have to keep from her. Another lie I would have to tell because I just didn’t think she would get it. Get what I was doing by going to the Cairn. Then again, it was New York, maybe shewouldget it...My fingers hovered over my phone. I didn’t want to lie to her, but I also wasn’t sure, so I took the conservative approach.
‘Got a book club, then helping my neighbor lady cook dinner.’
That seemed safe. It also seemed like a thing Tiffany wouldn’t ask to come along to.
‘So you’re basically 85?’ She sent back and I knew I’d picked the right activity to keep her from wanting to join.
‘LOL. Yes, I am tonight and I’m loving it.’ I looked up and saw that I was only a few doors down from the club, my feet had brought me here without much input from me, but now I had to go.‘Gotta run, just got to book club!’
‘You’re such a nerd. Have fun!’
‘Love you too.’
I shoved my phone into my pocket and sucked in a deep breath. The doors of the Cairn were imposing. They looked like they belonged out in some ancient European city, or on the set of a movie where the explorer reaches paradise. They were huge, carved from dark stone that made me think of obsidian or jet. They seemed to suck in the light of the city, absorb it rather than reflect, which always gave them a bit of an edge. A little bit of a dark and scary fairy tale touch that made me think of the Grimm’s brothers stories I’d read as a kid. Copper handles extended out, a patina of grey and green coloring the metal, and I hesitated for a second, fingers reaching but not touching.
Behind me a car passed by honking and a kid shrieked with laughter across the street. I could hear two women talking, their heels clicking on the pavement as they walked past me. All of it was mundane, so perfectly normal and at odds with the doors in front of me. The ones that looked like they’d been plucked from a dark fairy tale, but in this story the prince didn’t save the princess or slay her dragons. She did it.
My fingertips touched the handle and then I was gripping it and pulling the door open. I did not have a prince charming, and I probably never would, but that didn’t mean that I couldn’t and wouldn’t save myself. I slipped inside the club and closed the door firmly behind me, shutting out the normal world. The world where my power was fleeting and passing. I traded that world for the Cairn. And here, in this place, I had all the power—and that included saving myself.
“Hello, Honey,” Connie greeted me from the desk she sat at. It was a polished black hunk of obsidian that gleamed in the gold-hued lights of the anteroom. The color of it was a perfect match to the dark hardwood floors of the club and the desk gave the appearance that it had seemingly sprung up from the floor. The lines of the desk were sharp and jagged but they added a touch of feral to the room that reminded me precisely what it was that I was surrendering myself to when I crossed the Cairn’s threshold. The room was beautiful, at complete odds with the apartment I lived my life in. Where my home was sparsely decorated the Cairn was sumptuous in its furnishings. The walls were covered in wallpaper colored a shade of red so dark it was nearly black, gold gilt was brushed across some parts of it as if a painter had taken it to mind to brighten it up but then gotten distracted. The effect was beautiful and chaotic. Heavy crimson curtains ran floor to ceiling along the windows I knew to be black out. The effect created an inviting space that made you want to linger and appreciate the art on the walls, or the elegant furniture, a chaise lounge and a few leather backed chairs arranged around a fireplace with an obsidian mantle at the opposite wall.
Above us a sparkling chandelier glittered, casting a golden light on everything, but mostly the black as night desk that seemed to absorb the golden light right into it as if it were a living breathing thing, and not a piece of furniture.
And then there was Connie. The woman I thought was Zeus.
She was sitting behind the desk with her hands pressed flat to the surface with a smile on her face. It wasn’t a big inviting one, but it was a smile. One that softened her angular face enough that I knew I was welcome. I’d seen her cruel smile before. That one was a step above a snarl, features pulling into a mask of intense focus and bared teeth that left no meaning to just how very unwelcome the recipient was.
I hoped she’d used that sharp as knives smile on Christian.
“Connie, hi,” I greeted her back with a wave. I walked forward, my sneakers hardly making a sound on the hardwood floor. “How have you been?” I asked.
She inclined her head and tapped the mouse beside her, the screen in front of her springing to life. “I’ve been well. It’s been a few months since I’ve seen you. I hope everything is good for you.”
We met eyes. I could see the unasked question there. Has Christian been bothering you?
I gave a slight shake of my head and then said, “It has been. A lot of work, but it’s all been good. I’m happy to make some time for a visit though.” I put my bag by my feet and stood awkwardly in front of Connie’s intimidating as hell desk. I never knew what the fuck to do with my hands when I was standing here.
“Are you staying the night?” She asked, eyes sliding from me to the screen.
“Yes, if there’s a room available.”
“There is. Shall I book it?”
“Please. That’s wonderful news.” The weight I’d been carrying with me slipped off so suddenly and subtly that I almost pitched forward from its absence. My shoulders had been hunched since Law had left, the memory of him leaving pulling at me until every step I took felt as if I carried a thousand pounds on my back. Today had not been easy, even if I’d pretended it was.
“Wonderful.” She smiled even as her eyes were still on the screen and she gave it a few clicks. “I’ve added it to your account, but before I do that I need to tell you one very important thing, Honey.”
“What is it?” I asked on high alert.
