Page 71 of Sutherland's Secret
“Do what?”
“How do you see all of these people enter and leave your life forever and not feel something?”
“I can’t let myself feel anything. If I did, then I would forever be torn up, and I have too much to do to allow that.”
“It seems so sad.”
“No’ sad. Ye have to think of it as a happy occasion. They’re given a chance to start over, to create a whole new life. They have no future here, but in Canada they can create whatever they want.”
“Don’t you want to rail at the English for all they’ve done and everything they’ve taken away?”
“Aye. There are times when it becomes overwhelming, but what good would it do to let it overtake me? Anger wastes the energy I need for more productive pursuits. Do ye think the English will stop just because I rail and gnash my teeth?”
“But it makes me so angry, Brice. I want to do something about it.”
“Ye are. Ye’re thwarting them even if they don’t know it. They can’t torture and arrest if they have no one to torture and arrest.”
“It still doesn’t seem right.”
“Because it’s no’ right. I never said it was.”
She smiled at him. “Last night was exhilarating.”
He groaned and threw a hand over his eyes. “I knew ye would think so. This does no’ bode well for me.”
She punched him playfully in the arm. “Now that I have a taste for excitement, you won’t be able to stop me.”
“That’s my fear.”
She rested her fist on his chest and put her chin on her fist to look at him. “I wish I could stay and help you with theStaran. I’d be good at it. I know how to deliver a baby now.”
“Good God, I hope that never happens again.”
Eleanor chuckled. “Oh, Brice, it was so exhilarating and miraculous. I can’t stop thinking about it.”
“I would no’ be lying if I told ye that I’m glad it was ye who was there for it and no’ me. I’m no’ sure I could have done what needed to be done.”
“You would have been fine. I was scared to death, but I did it.”
He rolled to his side so they were face-to-face. “Ye are miraculous yerself, Eleanor.” She tried to wave his words away, but he captured her hand and brought it to his lips. “I mean it. Ye’ve changed so much since ye first came here. I’m proud of ye, lass.”
His words warmed her. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”
“I thank ye for yer help last night. I must admit that having a woman on the trail with us was beneficial.”
“You need a woman on the trail with you all the time.”
“Ach, but I think ye want to kill me.”
She laughed and propped her head up on her hand, suddenly serious. “I would stay and help you.”
The laughter faded from his eyes. “And forever be looking over yer shoulder for Blackwood?”
“He has to leave Scotland at some point.”
“No’ necessarily.” He paused, and she could tell he wanted to say something more. “I don’t understand that man. Why is he so intent on finding ye?”
Just the thought of Blackwood made Eleanor’s stomach churn. “Because I know the ‘proof’ he has of Charles’s treason charges is false. And because, for some strange reason, he wants to marry me.”
