Page 169 of Pack Frenzy
Heat pricks behind my eyes. My friends are okay, better than okay. I squeeze Rowan’s hand so hard he probably loses circulation. “When does Casey want to meet? Because I’m ready yesterday. Seriously, give me an address and I’ll hotwire a car if you make me wait.”
Rowan’s mouth twitches. “Not necessary.”
Cassian snorts. “There’s the Jess we know.”
“Here.” Eli pulls out a sleek phone—black glass and chrome. “Had all your data from the phone you lost in the Nexus bus crash. But if you want a different model, we can?—”
“Are you kidding?” I snatch it from his hands, turning it over. My photos. My contacts. My ridiculous text threads with the girls. “You got everything?”
“Everything,” Eli confirms, looking stupidly pleased with himself.
My throat goes tight. These men saved my photos, texts, all of it. “I—” Words fail and tackle Eli first, then Cassian, then Rowan, hugging each of them like I’m trying to fuse our atoms together. “You’re unreal. I can’t believe you did this. Thank you all so much.”
“We know,” Cassian murmurs, grinning against my temple. “You’re not exactly subtle.”
“Good,” I shoot back. “Subtle’s boring.”
Eli laughs. “Careful, or we’ll think you actually like us.”
“Shut up,” I mumble, but I’m grinning so hard my face hurts.
Eli’s smile softens and he clears his throat. “There’s…one more thing. The ninety days are up. Technically, they ended three days ago, but Nexus gave us an extension because of the trial. Now they want an answer.”
His fingers brush mine. “If you want to make us your official pack or not.”
Air hits weird—tight and hot—and I ride it out. I’ve never asked a question that mattered this much.
For years, I’ve been the girl no one asked if I was okay after Sabrina. If I wanted or needed anything. I was the girl who laughed too loud, moved too fast, stole her mom’s car, and pretended the empty house didn’t get her. I made myself sharp so no one could see the soft parts. So no one could leave me behind again.
But standing here, looking at them: at Rowan’s steady gaze, Cassian’s clenched jaw, Eli’s hopeful smile, I realize I’m done hiding. If I’m going to do this, if I’m going to stay, I need to be brave enough to let them see me. All of me. Even the parts that are still bleeding.
If they’re going to choose me, it has to be the real me. The messy, scared, too-much version I’ve kept locked down for years. And if they don’t?—
God, if they don’t, it’ll destroy me. But at least I’ll know I was brave enough to ask.
“Wait. My turn first.” I lift a hand. “I know what you lost with Meredith. I know what that grief did to you.” I force myself to hold their gazes even though every instinct screams to look away, to laugh it off, to be the girl who doesn’t need answers. “A-and I need you honest—not noble, not kind. Are you choosing me because you wantME, or because you can’t stand the empty space? Because if your Alpha instincts just can’t handle losing another Omega, if I’m the Band-Aid on a wound that won’t close, then I need to know now.”
My voice cracks. Damn it. “Because I’ve lived in shadows my whole life. Sabrina’s ghost. The invisible daughter. The girl who had to make noise just to prove she existed. I won’t—” I swallow hard. “I won’t be a placeholder. Not even for you. I need to know I’m not just... convenient.”
“Jess—” Rowan starts.
“Stop.” In two strides, Cassian’s hands are on my face, rough palms impossibly gentle. His fingers flex like he’s fighting the urge to haul me in. “You think we’d want you out of obligation?”
“You’re good men who do the right thing even when it wrecks them,” I say. “So I’m asking straight: is this what you really want, not what you think you owe?”
“Christ.” His thumb catches a tear. “You really don’t see it, do you?”
See what? That I’m not Meredith. Not Sabrina. Not the compliant daughter the Institute tried to sand smooth.
Do they want the messy, difficult, stubborn version—the one who gave away her breakfast, squared up to Alphas, and refused to disappear quietly? The version I’ve been told my whole life was wrong?
My throat tightens. I won’t cry. Something behind my ribs cracks open anyway, just enough for hope.
Eli steps in, shoulder brushing mine. “You need to hear it from us first,” he says. “No witnesses. No Nexus. Just us.”
Rowan moves until the three of them box me in—solid, safe, terrifying. “Jess, look at me.”
The command steadies me.
