Page 2 of Change the Plan
He bends to kiss me, his lips soft on my forehead. I grab a fistful of his shirt and tip my head back until our mouths meet, kissing him hard, opening the bond between us that we usually let sit dormant these days. Maybe it’s a mistake, because I don’t like it when my husband has to go like this in the middle of the night, even though I know he has to. It’s not fair of me to complain about it, even through telepathically transmitted feelings.
He never asked to be an alpha. Like his father and every other alpha that exists, he was born one. I know his dad, Weston, calls it a curse.
“You’re always my number one,” he whispers into the dark. “I promise you that, Ellie.”
“I know.”
“I love you, more than anything.” Another kiss, this time at the corner of my mouth, a quiet goodbye. I don’t know why I’m feeling so emotional, my words trapped in my throat, so I simply push my love for him through the bond as he steps away.
The shadow of him pauses in the bedroom doorway, eyes flashing. “I’m building this pack to keep you safe,” he says, and then he’s gone, leaving me with the reminder that he may be a wolf, but I’m still the true danger to us here.
CHAPTER TWO
VAN
Irun in my shifted form alongside the majority of my pack, the acceptance of two new members, Finn and Zara, having lured most of the adult wolves out for the night. The waxing moon shines high above us and the breeze is just enough to ruffle our fur. I let my younger brother Seth take the lead while I follow at the rear, and the sound of snapping branches, scrabbling paws, and loud panting fills the air as we travel on the public walking tracks that cross the island, cutting through dense forest and rolling farmland on our way down to one of the largest beaches.
All of us here grew up under the universal glamour, a magic originating in the First Realm that had been imposed upon this world for over two millennia. Designed to hide the existence of non-humans from our human neighbours, it meant many non-humans lived and died without ever existing in their true forms.
My siblings and I were some of the lucky ones. With a witch for a mother, we lived a significant portion of our lives in our true bodies; as long as we were in the privacy of our own home without any humans present, we were free to be ourselves. Mom’s ability to remove the glamour was what endeared her to my father’s pack. Werewolves aren’t typicallytolerated by shifters and vice versa, but she’s always been an asset to that pack, having given them access to their true bodies for decades before the glamour finally fell away for good during the Unravelling.
The wolves here weren’t so lucky. Some of them had only shifted a handful of times in their thirty, forty, fifty years. Now, four and a half years post-Unravelling, I know some of them struggle to go more than a day without shifting, their wolves always desperate to be set free and run. I may have had the privilege of shifting often, but on nights like this when I’m feeding off the euphoric energy of the pack, even I feel that pull to stay in my wolf form for longer than I usually would.
We’re almost at the island’s largest beach when I catch the scent of another wolf on the wind, a warning growl ripping from my throat before I can stop myself. I bark once at the wolves ahead to keep going before circling back the way we came, the more rational part of me sayingstay calmeven as I growl once more, picking up my pace to chase off the lone alpha here. It doesn’t matter that in the light of day Benji is one of my employees, just a kid at twenty years old, and the nephew of one of my pack members who has become family after marrying my mother-in-law. In this moment all my wolf cares about is that he’s a rival alpha, and if he dares to come too close to my pack, then…
I spot him in the distance and growl again, hackles rising, muscles tensing, my body poised to attack.You need him,I argue with myself in one of the moments where it’s obvious that all the parts of me are not only fragmented, but in opposition with each other.You need him to be pack. You need him for the future.
My wolf hates the idea. He always has and always will, and I don’t know if I’ve got enough strength to pull this off. I growl atthe other wolf again in a final warning and he backs away while I force my wolf not to chase.
There are only ever two alphas in a pack. I grew up being the second alpha— a rival to my father — and it dominated our relationship for over sixteen years. We’re cursed, Dad and I, and I’m determined to not let history repeat itself with the next generation.
It’snear sunrise by the time I return to our bedroom. Ellie sleeps peacefully, full lips ever-so-slightly parted, the point of one ear — her only defining fae feature when in this form — just visible beneath the long blonde hair that splays across her pillow. I crawl back into bed, curling myself around Ellie’s body. She sighs in her sleep, mutters “Too manypumpkins, don’t understand… not even an edible variety,” and rolls over, burrowing into me until I have my arm around her and her head resting on my chest. I fight desperately with myself, biting my fist in an attempt to hold back my laughter over my poor wife’s apparent pumpkin-fuelled nightmares.
I’d taken her back to California last October — her first visit to the States — and on top of the business I had to conduct, we’d done some of the tourist things for her sake: visiting a pumpkin patch and picking a pumpkin to carve for Halloween, going to all the big theme parks, taking kids — Lacey’s two boys — trick or treating. The trip itself was a one born of necessity; I needed to sell a house I owned in Santa Rosa, smack bang in the middle of my father’s pack territory. My siblings both opted to tag along, and given the fact that it was the first time I was returning to the area after leaving the pack, I was grateful for the company. We’d even taken Ellie up into the redwoods forest — the only placewhere my old pack was free to safely shift away from human eyes pre-Unravelling — and I’d loved watching her walk between the towering trees as she brought her magic forward, fae antlers settling on her head, blossom petals drifting to the ground in the breeze. She’d amassed an audience of children as she grew glowing green mushrooms for their entertainment while my father’s second, Sam, watched warily.
I’d been dreading meeting the pack again after what went down between Dad and I. He may have started it that day, goading me over an issue I now realise was manufactured on his part to get me to break away from the pack, but I certainly ended it, and the sense of disgust from my then pack members had been overwhelming in the moments before I broke free of them all.
I should’ve known that having Ellie by my side would not only make it bearable, but actually enjoyable. “It’s water under the bridge,”Sam said to me at one point, nodding in the direction of my wife as he finished with, “And it looks like it worked out well for you in the end.”
It did. In hindsight, I’m thankful that I didn’t become the alpha of that pack, because had I taken on the responsibility of three hundred individuals, I don’t think I would’ve left the States. I wouldn’t have been able to. I wouldn’t have purchased this vineyard here in Aotearoa. I wouldn’t have ended up finding the love of my life again here on this island of all places. I wouldn’t have managed to convince her to forgive me for being such an undeserving idiot, given all the years that we were apart.
I would’ve missed all of this.
“Fuck,”I whisper, pressing my nose to Ellie’s hair, breathing in deep, grounding myself in her presence. I’ve come to realise that I’m always like this in the days after adding on new members to the pack. I’m one big emotional mess, and though I try not to let it show, I know Ellie can always tell. Everyonethinks alphas are tough, but every time we experience a change within our pack like this, we take on the emotions of those new individuals and the sense of responsibility over their lives. It’s exhausting, but I can’t stop the instinct that always pushes me to take on more.
“Hey,” Ellie whispers in the dark, her hand reaching up to settle on my face. I hadn’t meant to wake her. “I’m proud of you.” Her lips are soft against my jaw, her kiss sleepy and light.
“Thank you.”
She’s out again within seconds, her limbs relaxing, breath settling back into an even pattern.
I remain awake, contemplating the future and whether I’m getting things right.
CHAPTER THREE
ELLIE
Ilove our home on Motuwai with its sweeping views of the Hauraki Gulf, the sloping fields of grapevines, and the subtropical climate, but the scenery down here in the South Island is equally as stunning in its own way. The air is cold and crisp — itfeelslike autumn, something that doesn’t tend to hit until April in the north — and the maunga here seem to never end. Wherever I look, my breath is taken away by ancient mountains and deep lakes, and by the way nature so clearly conveys that the seasons are changing. The first hints of autumn colours are beginning to touch the trees, and there’s no finer example than in the gardens on our own property, a sprawling estate of formal gardens, paddocks, and forest, all surrounding the mansion at the centre of it.
