Page 27 of Fated Midlife Christmas
“But listen to me,” Maeve said. “I already apologized for rattling on, and then I kept doing it. By the look on your face, I know you weren’t here just to say hello. Tell me what’s going on.”
Amanda sat down on the couch, the soft hat in her hands. She’d always thought of wool as being rough and itchy, but this was unbelievably soft. “I had a rough day at work,” she began, “but I’ve been having a lot of those lately.”
“Mmhm.” Maeve sat next to her and folded her hands on her knees, her silver rings glinting in the moonlight. She tipped her face toward Amanda to make sure she knew she was listening.
“I can’t seem to get things right.” It was hard to explain, but she knew Maeve would understand. “I’m still helping my clients. They feel better when they leave the office, but I know I should be able to do more. I thought maybe it was the amount of time I was spending with them, but even in longer sessions, I just feel like I’m hitting a wall.”
“You know, you do keep some very demanding hours,” Maeve pointed out.
“I have to if I’m going to get to everyone,” Amanda defended. “I can’t just take a day off.”
“And that’s part of the problem,” the older woman returned. “Amanda, darling, you are incredibly talented, but even you can’t heal the whole world. That’s not your job, and you can’t expect it of yourself. It’s okay to cut back a little and make time for other things.”
Amanda pulled in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “You’re not wrong, but I still don’t think this is a matter of just being burned out. I think I might have some blockages.”
“Why don’t you lie down and let me take a look?” Maeve stood and went across the room. She turned on some soft music, and when she came back, she hovered her hands justover Amanda’s head and slowly worked her way down. “Is there anything specific that makes you think it’s a blockage?”
“Well, let’s just say another energy expert pointed them out to me with very little effort,” Amanda replied miserably.
Maeve’s hands stopped just over Amanda’s chest. Then she moved down a little further and stopped again. “Does this expert happen to have blonde hair and a cute accent?”
“He does.” She didn’t want Lars to be right, but Amanda could feel it within herself.
“And he told you that your heart and solar plexus are where the problem is located?” Maeve continued.
“Not in so many words, but yes.” It’d shocked the hell out of her that he’d been able to pinpoint them so easily.
Maeve stopped what she was doing. She scootched Amanda over on the couch so she could sit next to her, and then she took her hands. “I’m glad you came to me, and I’m flattered that you wanted my advice. The thing is, I don’t think you need it. You already know just as well as I do what’s going on here.”
“It could be,” Amanda reasoned, “but maybe there’s something else.”
Maeve gave her a dubious look. “I remember the last time you had these exact same symptoms, and I remember what caused them.”
“Dale.” Amanda clung tightly to her aunt’s hands and closed her eyes. “But I’m over him.”
“The man himself, sure,” Maeve reasoned. “That doesn’t mean you’re over what he did, and it certainly doesn’t mean you’re ready to trust just anyone with your heart.”
“Lars isn’t just anyone.” Amanda pulled her hands back and put them beneath her to sit up, which wasn’t easy on the soft couch. Her joints and muscles were also really feeling all that ice skating. “I think he’s my mate.”
“You think, or you know?” Maeve asked quietly.
Amanda sighed again. Maeve was always direct. “I know. But I don’t know what to do about it. I really struggled in my relationship with Dale, even when I thought things were good. Then it all went sour, and I struggled even more. Those blockages were hell to clear. If Lars is the person I’m supposed to be with, then why would they come back?”
“The human body and mind are finicky things. They do all sorts of crazy shit without our permission,” Maeve reasoned. “It seems to me that being around Lars triggered these symptoms for you, even if he’s not the one who originally caused them.”
“Well, great.” Amanda swung her feet to the floor and braced her elbows on her knees. “So I finally meet my mate, but he just makes me sick and lives on the other side of the world.”
Maeve laughed. “Let’s look at this one problem at a time, shall we? The most immediate issue is your health and well-being. Meeting Lars might have brought these issues out of remission, but it doesn’t mean that he actually caused them. That’s within you. You’ve got to change your beliefs about the issue, no matter how deeply rooted they are.”
“That’s not an easy thing to do.” Amanda stood and went to the window, looking out over the spacious back yard and the section of wood just behind the covenstead. “I don’t even have to close my eyes to remember what it was like catching Dale with another woman, and I know our situation isn’t the first like it. Lots of people find that they can’t handle the loneliness of being so far apart, and they seek comfort from someone else.”
“But it’s not fair to assume that everyone is like that,” Maeve countered. “How do you think Lars would feel if you told him you thought he was going to cheat on you?”
“I mean, I’m not saying he’sgoing to cheat on me,” Amanda began, but then she stopped. She didn’t want to believe Lars could do such a thing, but in her mind she’d already assigned the sin to him.
She’d have to think about that some more. “Even if I can trust him, how are we supposed to make it work when we’re so far apart?”
“What if you weren’t far apart?”
