Page 99 of Lucky Boys
“Let me look at your hole.” He just mumbled, half asleep.
I made quick work of examining it, red but nothing torn, since Mav knew what he was doing, and put cream there and a few other places that looked particularly sore. I glanced over and Maverick was doing the same to Brooks, whispering to him.
“Let’s just get them in bed,” he told me quietly. “Everything else can wait.”
I agreed. I honestly didn’t know how much longer I could stand on my own two feet anyway. I was slowly drowning and just hoped that I could hang on long enough to fall apart privately.
We managed to get the boys in the bed and settled in between us. I tried not to think too much about the fact that Brooks went right back to Maverick, snuggling into him with his back to me. It . . . didn’t matter. He was getting the comfort and care he needed, and I had Skye draped over me with a happy smile on his face.
“Get some rest, honey.”
“You too, Boss. You look wrecked.”
I snorted but kissed the side of his head and held tight.
I managed not to fall apart. At least not until both Skye and Brooks were sound asleep. And then I crashed.
I heard Maverick slip out of bed but squeezed my eyes shut. He should be getting rest and focusing on the boys, not me. I’d brought this on myself. I’d promised all my men I’d do better. I’d promised Brooks I wanted something real with him and then had immediately shut them all out. I wasn’t being the Dom they deserved. The boyfriend they deserved. Fuck. I was barely being the boss they deserved. I was letting my stress and frustration get the best of me.
Even earlier today, Brooks had tried to kneel for me while I’d been working and I’d made him leave. Why? It would have been so simple to allow him to rest on my thigh while I worked. It was all he’d asked for and I couldn’t even give him that. No wonder he’d broken down like that. I’d had no fucking business doing that scene with him.
Mav’s rough digit wiped one of my tears away. I pried my eyes open to look at him. He was kneeling next to me, and I could just make out his sharp jawline and the intense look in his eyes in the hallway light coming in from under the door.
“There’s someone who wants to talk to you,” he whispered and held up his phone. I nearly broke down and cried when Wes’s concerned face filled the screen.
I glanced at Maverick. “You need your best friend now.” He leaned over and kissed me, showing all the love and support he had for me.
“Thank you.” My voice was gruff.
“Do you want me to come with you?”
I appreciated it, but I wanted him to stay with the boys. “This is enough. Thank you, babe. I love you.”
“I love you too. It’ll be okay.”
I sure fucking hoped so. I slid out of the bed, taking Mav’s phone with me and quietly leaving the room. But I didn’t make it far, sinking against the wall and to the floor right outside the bedroom door.
“Luca, talk to me, darling.”
I shook my head. “Wes—” My voice broke.
“Luc, what happened? I’m here, babe, whatever it is.”
I started talking and then just couldn’t stop. Between crying jags and with halts and stops, I told Wes everything, and he listened like he always did. At some point, Maverick came out and sat with me. By the time I was done, it was nearly daylight. I was exhausted and sore and fucking hollow, but I felt better, more hopeful maybe. Two of the men I loved more than anything were right here, not letting me fall on my own, and the other two were right on the other side of the door.
“Brooks loves you,” Wes told me after I finally let it all out. “He’s not going anywhere. Tell him everything you told us. You’ll be okay.”
I believed him. I had to. I’d fucked up, but it wasn’t too late. I could be the man, boyfriend, and Dom my men deserved. I wouldn’t let them down again.
When the sun started to shine through the windows, I finally stood up, my whole body aching. “Fuck, I’m too old for this shit.”
Maverick laughed. “You’re telling me. I need that warm bath immediately.”
I glanced back at the phone, where Wes was still on with me. At some point, Diego had come in the room, after I’d said it was okay, and he was dozing off on the couch next to Wes. They weren’t touching at all, but the connection between the two men was still palpable. Wes’s lids were heavy. It was now late at night back at home, but he didn’t say a word.
I smiled softly at him. “Go get some rest, love. I’m good. I promise.”
“You are good, Luc. Everything will be fine.”
