Page 80 of Lucky Boys
“Yeah, okay? About what?”
I sighed and took a breath. I very much wanted to drag Diego onto my lap and hold him to me while we had this discussion, but I doubted he would be okay with that. Instead, I asked, “Can I hold your hand, angel? There’s no right or wrong answer. I won’t be angry or upset if you say no.”
His breath hitched a little and he stared at my hand for so long, I started to regret asking, but finally, he nodded. “Y-yeah. I think I’d like that.”
I hoped I didn’t look too overeager as I placed my hand palm up and waited for him to put his in mine. He only hesitated for a second before doing exactly that. It felt perfect, like that was exactly where it was meant to be.
I could tell he was still stiff, so I decided not to bring extra attention to it and just got started. “As I’m sure you know, Luca and the others are kinky and engage in a BDSM dynamic.”
It was a weird way to start, and by Diego’s expression, he thought so too, but I wasn’t sure how else to segue into this.
“Yeah . . .”
“Well, I wanted to talk to you about what it means to me.”
Diego flinched, but he didn’t pull away. “I guess I should’ve realized you weren’t completely vanilla.”
I smiled. “I’m not, but I’m not into the lifestyle the way Luca and his men are, or it seems Brooks is. It’s something I enjoy very much, and I tend to fall into the role even in a vanilla relationship, but I don’t need it the way Luca does. I can be veryhappy and content in a more vanilla dynamic. I can absolutely love someone without needing that in any type of formal way.”
Diego frowned. “Can you just spell it out plainly please?”
I huffed, a little frustrated with myself. I had been having this conversation in my mind for days now, but when I was finally having it with the person it needed to be with, I was fumbling it all up.
“Yes, sorry. I consider myself a Daddy Dom.”
Diego tilted his head. “I need a little more than that, Wes. I know a lot about it. I did a shit ton of research with Brooks when he was first discovering he was a sub. And even before that, when I realized I wasn’t having crushes or the same desires most of my classmates had, my mom and I looked up pretty much everything.” He shook his head, a small, amused smile on his face. “I just want to know what being a Daddy means to you. Do you like age play? Or is more of a caretaker thing?”
“Caretaker. I’ve played with a few littles before, and it’s fun but not something I’d want long-term, I don’t think. I like to be in charge. I like making sure my partner knows they’re loved and cared for. I like making sure they ate dinner, and got enough sleep, and helping provide that for them. I like praising my boy, telling him how good and special he is. What that means exactly would depend on my partners.”
Diego was quiet for a while, picking at a thread on his shorts. “And this is something you’d be into, even if it never gets sexual?”
“Yes.” Without a doubt, I wanted this with Diego. I didn’t care about not having sex with him. I wanted him as a person. “But like I said, it doesn’t have to be anything formal. We’re already kind of drifting in that direction. Can we continue like this and see how it goes? If it develops naturally, then that’s great. If it doesn’t, well, then that’s okay too.”
He nodded. “Yeah, I’d like that. I like us. This. It’s so new and confusing and has me questioning some things. But I like that you planned this for me, and I like when you make me drink water or step away from the computer.” I’d been trying to do small things like that since the guys had left without overstepping boundaries. I was thrilled that he was okay with it.
“Really? So you don’t mind if I keep doing that? I just want to make sure you’re eating and caring for your own well-being.”
“I-I don’t mind. It’s nice.”
“I’m so glad, angel. And remember, even if it’s not sexual, safewords always apply. If at any time you need me to step back or stop something, tell me.”
“I will. Can we, um, talk about Luca and all them?”
I tried not show my concern. “Of course.”
He took a deep breath. “I, um, I don’t mind you being with them. Sexually, I mean. I know you and Luca are a done deal, and of course I’m good with that. But even the others. If you wanted to have sex with them, I’d be fine with that. Just, can we keep it between us six? No one outside the dynamic?”
Fuck did I want to kiss Diego right now. I wanted to show him everything I was feeling through my touch. But he was just starting to trust me, and I’d never do something without permission and violate that.
“Absolutely. Until very recently, I always assumed I was completely monogamous. It was why I held off with Luca for so long. Also, just so everything is clear, I don’t desire having a romantic relationship with Mav, Skye, or Brooks. As long as you’re comfortable with it, if it happens organically, I wouldn’t mind having a scene with them, sexual or otherwise, but it’s only you and Luca I want more than that with. And definitely no one outside our little polycule.”
That seemed to relax Diego and he leaned into my arm just a little bit. “I-I like that. I don’t know what I might want sexually.I always kind of figured I was pretty close to the sex adverse side of the ace spectrum, but recently—” He swallowed and looked down. “Maybe I’m more demi? I don’t really know.”
“Hey, angel, can you look at me please?” He shrugged but eventually looked up, “Good boy, thank you. It’s okay to not know. It’s also okay if it changes. Sexuality is fluid. Things might change as you get older or gain more experience, and that’s completely fine. It’s also fine to never label it. You’re Diego Foster. All that other stuff is just society’s way of trying to understand it and fit people into boxes.”
“Okay, thanks. That makes me feel a little better. I still don’t think I have any interest in participating. But, I, um, maybe would like to watch.”
Oh fuck, he was going to kill me.
