Page 81 of Before You Say I Do
“I know this isn’t the optimal time to be saying this. But I had to give it a go. Because saying it after you got married would be worse.” Jordan took both of Abby’s hands in hers, then looked her in the eye.
“I started this journey as your professional bridesmaid. But I ended up falling for you.” Jordan’s chest rose as she breathed in. “I love you, Abby.” Sensation overwhelmed her, but she carried on. “I never expected that to happen, and I’m sorry if this messes with your plans for today. If you feel the same in any small way, maybe we can build on that. Maybe we could make it work in the real world. In a world where you’re not marrying someone else.”
Jordan didn’t break their gaze as she waited for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually, Abby began to shake her head.
Jordan’s stomach hit the floor.
This wasn’t how this was supposed to go.
Abby was supposed to fall into her arms.
“I never expected this to happen, either.” Abby’s words came out as a whisper. “But I made the car drive around the block three times, because I knew if it stopped, I was going to have to go through with it. Either that, or break Marcus’s heart. Neither of those options were appealing. I didn’t want to get out of the car. I’d just decided I wouldn’t go through with the wedding. Then you appeared, and my heart boomed. I’ve tried to ignore my feelings too, but I can’t anymore.”
It was all Jordan could do not to collapse on the spot.
A trickle of hope slid down her spine, but she wasn’t going to embrace it just yet.
Abby dropped her hands. “I’m sorry for telling you not to come. I couldn’t face you, without the truth about how I felt leaking out. But you’re right. I shouldn’t marry someone else if my heart tells me not to.” She glanced over at Gloria, who was dabbing her eyes with a tissue. “My mum was just telling me the same thing. That I should be with someone I truly love, not someone I think I should love.”
Jordan held her breath.
“I’m so glad you came back and took a chance. You were brave. You’ve made me brave in return.” Abby fixed Jordan with her gaze. She took a deep breath before she continued. “I love you, too. I’m sorry I never told you before. I’m sorry we got this far before I said anything.” Abby glanced down at herself, before bringing her face back level with Jordan. “But here I am, standing in a wedding dress, declaring love for someone I’m not going to marry.” She shook her head, before lifting her gaze, staring directly into Jordan’s eyes. “Not yet, anyway.”
Jordan’s heart soared.
For a few brief moments, everything was perfect.
“Abby!” Marcus’s voice rang out through the air.
They both stepped back, turning to where Marcus was running down the path of the church towards where the mini congregation were stood: Gloria, Karen, the driver, Heidi, Delta, Taran, Abby and Jordan. His best man, Philip, was right behind.
Marcus was dressed in a sharp blue suit and pink tie. He looked from Abby to Jordan and back. “What’s going on? Why is Jordan not wearing her dress?” He couldn’t seem to make sense of the picture, no matter how hard he tried.
“What are you doing here? It’s bad luck to see each other before the wedding!” Even Abby looked confused by her own statement.
“I decided I’d chance it when one of my groomsmen told me there appeared to be some sort of hold-up.” He paused. “Is someone going to fill me in?”
Abby glanced at Jordan, shaking her head. “I will,” she said, her voice cracking. “This is up to me.” She took Marcus by the hand and steered him away from the others, but still in earshot of Jordan.
“Marcus, I need you to know that I never meant for any of this to happen. Hold on to that thought, even when it’s really hard.” She paused, taking a breath. “Also, that I really do love you. A part of me always will. You are a wonderful man, and I’ve no doubt you’re going to make someone a wonderful husband.”
Marcus’s shoulders slumped, and his face crumpled. “Someone?”
Jordan hoped he didn’t cry. This must be his worst nightmare. It certainly would be hers.
Abby nodded. “Just not me. I’m so sorry.” She paused and gripped his arm, clearly just about holding it together. “I know this is a terrible time to do this, and I hope one day you can forgive me. But I really do believe this is the best decision for both of us.” She took his hand. “But I can’t marry you when I have feelings for someone else.” Abby dipped her head. “Feelings for Jordan.”
Marcus looked like he’d just been punched. He dropped Abby’s hands, and tangled his fingers in his dark hair. “Jordan? But she’s your bridesmaid.”
He looked at Jordan, disbelief staining his face.
Abby took a deep breath. “She was. But now, she’s something more. I can’t ignore how I feel, and I can’t marry you knowing that. You and I have been friends for so long. I truly never meant to hurt you.”
Marcus shook his head, his face full of disbelief. “You and Jordan? But you’re not gay?”
Abby ignored his comment. Now was not the time for explanations. “I was happy with you. Please believe that. But I was having doubts over the past few months. I should have told you. I know that now.”
Marcus turned to Jordan. “I knew you were too good to be true.”
