Page 60 of The Christmas Catch
Subtle. Really subtle.
They lay in silence for a few moments, the only sound the low rumble of Helen and Jamie’s voices from along the hallway. It was Morgan who broke first.
“I’m really sorry about your dad. I always liked him.”
The muscles in Ali’s jaw clenched. “Thanks. Everyone said the same.”
“Because it’s true.” Morgan paused. “How is your family doing with it?”
Ali steadied her breathing as much as she could. What was the answer? She didn’t know. She’d steadfastly avoided going back since his funeral. She didn’t want to deal with the fact he was dead, so she’d swept it under the carpet. She’d left Nicole, Stuart, and her mum to pick up the pieces and carry on. She’d gone back to her life and pretended like nothing had happened. That charade would have to end soon.
“Honestly? I have no fucking idea. I call them, they call me, we message. We even have the occasional Zoom. But we don’t really talk about it. I’m sure they do without me. They must do. And sometimes Nicole calls me and tries to talk, but I always have some place to go, something to do. I always have an excuse. Because I don’t want to deal with it.” She shook her head. “I know that’s wrong of me. I know it’s not what my family needs, but it’s how I cope.”
Morgan reached under the covers and took Ali’s hand in hers.
It was warm, comforting.
Ali let her.
“Everyone copes with grief differently. I know that was the case when my granddad died. Same with my nan. Mum fell to pieces, we all picked up the slack. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
Ali tipped her head to the ceiling. She admired the cornicing on the central light before she replied.
“True, but I had a choice. I could leave. They couldn’t. They had to stay and deal with everyone knowing. Be in the place where he’d lived his life every single day. I couldn’t stand that. Even being there for the week after his death leading up to the funeral was stifling. I could leave, so I did. I’m sure that makes me a terrible person.”
Morgan squeezed her hand. “I think that makes you a normal person.” Her thumb stroked the palm of Ali’s hand.
Ali felt it everywhere. Suddenly, the room became louder, just like her heartbeat inside her. She turned to face Morgan, and she could see it all in Morgan’s eyes. The sympathy for her dad’s death, the understanding of how she’d reacted.
Ali didn’t want any of it.
She’d run away from her family, run away from what had happened. She didn’t deserve understanding.
Right now, she certainly didn’t want Morgan’s sad puppy eyes on her. She wanted Morgan’s lips.
Ali’s brain and body agreed.
“You know, I’m always here if you need a sympathetic ear. If you want to talk. I knew your dad, but I’m not directly involved, so maybe that makes me the perfect person?”
Ali had heard enough.
“Morgan.” She twisted her body to face her. She had no idea where to start. No idea where this was going. But all she knew was she wanted to get off the topic of her dad. If the only way she could do that was to cover Morgan’s lips with her own, then so be it. Ali moved forward until their lips were within inches of each other. “I just want to pretend we’re back on the Ferris wheel, back in that magical moment. I don’t want to talk about my dad. Not when I’m in bed with you. I want to kiss you again. You think we could do that instead?”
There was a moment of hesitation on Morgan’s face before her features relaxed. She nodded. “I think that can be arranged.”
Morgan’s smooth fingers glided across Ali’s cheek; her scorched gaze lasered Ali’s soul.
Ali took a steadying breath. They hadn’t even kissed yet, but this was already a level up from the Ferris wheel. That had been surprise, shock. This was not. But it was years of Ali’s dreams on the line.
Morgan’s nose slid next to Ali’s, her mouth tantalisingly close. She looked into Ali’s eyes, silently asking the question.
Ali’s gaze didn’t waver, giving Morgan her answer.
But even though Ali knew the kiss was coming, she still wasn’t prepared. When Morgan’s lips met hers, a cannon of gold confetti exploded inside her, and her mind and body soared. Everything else in the room fell away, apart from Morgan’s lips. She’d had her eyes on the prize for two decades. Finally grasping it in her hands was almost dreamlike.
Morgan moaned into Ali’s mouth, then her tongue parted Ali’s lips and slid inside.
Ali sucked her in. She wanted every part of Morgan Scott. She’d wanted it when she caught her gaze earlier in the card game. She’d wanted it when their fingers had accidentally collided when they reached for the pepper grinder. She’d definitely wanted it this morning when she woke up with Morgan lying next to her, but strictly out of bounds.
