Page 20 of Kingpin's Baby
“Ren.” I say her name like it’s a prayer. “I’m here. They’re never going to take you away. I’ll protect you from anything. I swear.”
The darkness is a blanket that wraps us up together, away from our real-life selves as well as the harsh reality of day.
Her body softens. Relaxes with my hand over her throat. A claim, a promise. I might be a monster who could steal her life right now, but I amhermonster, and I’m possessive. I won’t give her up to anyone else. Her breathing evens out.
She’s asleep.
And relief is the last thing I remember before I, too, fall into black.
7
REN
I wake in the dark. Three things strike me like flares of light.
First, I’m in Jasper’s arms. His bicep is under my neck, his other arm over my shoulder and his hand clasping around, completing the necklace.
I’ve never felt so safe. I’m his collared pet, warm and snug and protected. Most people would be scared, I suppose, to discover they were married to their stalker. But knowing Jasper was looking after me all this time only makes me happier. This might only be six months, but I’m certain he’ll care for me so long as we have this fake marriage.
Second: Jasper was stalking me. He’s cared for me and yeah, I’m not thrilled he was watching me in my kitchen—I really hope I didn’t do anything stupid while he was looking—that isn’t a normal level of surveillance, even for a mafia employee. “Why do you think?”, he replied earlier. And while my heart lifted, I didn’t dare answer truthfully. That maybe he cares for me. To protect me, yes. But there’s only one kingpin of Fulham, and he was outsidemyapartment. No one else’s. I think I’m special to him.
Well, I thought so until he tucked me into bed rather than taking up my offer of being his real wife.
Third: this is my wedding night. And while I can’t say that I’m unsatisfied—how could I be when Jasper licked me until I begged for mercy earlier on his desk—I’m still a virgin. Even though he made me come on his tongue, his fingers in my pussy, I need more.
And yes, I love this sweet, restrained version of Jasper, just holding me.But I know there’s another side of him that I could awaken. I saw it in his office. I want more of that.
It could be minutes or hours since I fell asleep, but I’m awake now. As I lie in the dark, his hand a secure collar over my neck, the thought floats into my mind. Again.
A baby.
I want Jasper’s baby.
No one could doubt our marriage if I had a baby.
And yeah, that’s a good excuse. Another is that I want a part of him to remember this charmed, sweet time with him by. But I also want the sex that would get me pregnant, and yes, I’d hurt so badly leaving, but he’s made it clear he doesn’t want me permanently. Otherwise, why didn’t he take me up on my offer when he joined me in bed?
I could give him my virginity as a gift.
Maybe he wouldn’t even fully wake up, and act on instinct? Perhaps he’d think he was dreaming, and take me like he would any woman in his bed? And in a few months, before I was showing, I could move on. I’ll never have him, but I’d have his child as well as the delicious memory of him inside me.
Is this a morally right thing to do? Definitely not. Without a doubt, it’s death not donuts.
But I’m desperate. I need Jasper so much. I’m aching and empty, and I saw his erection earlier.
He’s a man, and all the stereotypes say men constantly want sex. And even if maybe that’s true for some men, it can’t becorrect for all, and for sure Jasper is not like most men. He’s got more honour in his little finger than anyone I’ve ever met.
Which makes what I’m doing all the more reprehensible.
I’m just longing to touch my husband’s dick, and definitely a bad person. But I’m so high after today, when he made all my dreams come true except the most important one, that I don’t care.
I subtly wriggle backwards over the sheets. His hand is still at my neck, so secure. A bit further, moving slowly so I don’t wake him, and then… I sigh with relief when my butt touches his hard length. His body wants me, at least.
Reaching behind, I oh-so-gently grasp the waistband of his soft cotton boxers, and slide it down. Then we’re skin to skin, and it’s indescribable how good it feels. He’s hot and silky. Heated velvet stone as I lift my upper leg and rest it on his thigh, opening myself up.
I’m wet. My nipples are tingling. My clit pulses as I shift until… Ummph. I stuff my fist into my mouth to hold back a whimper. The head of his dick rests in my soaking folds. He’s so solid. Andbig. Far bigger than I anticipated. Excitement flickers through me.
Though the logistics are turning out to be more difficult than I thought.
