Page 38 of Amelia and Her Prince Charming
And yet, it felt like I did.
“Shiloh was the best of us in so many ways, but he was also a pain in the butt sometimes. His bets went too far. He loved praise to an annoying degree. And once he set his sights on something, he’d forget everything and everyone else in the pursuit of his goal.”
I wanted to close my eyes to the disloyal thoughts, but Dylan continued. “Remember that time he convinced us to sneak into the vacation rentals on the hill and steal all the remaining food from the houses with that cheap lock you could jimmy open witha credit card? And one of them wasn’t vacated yet? We’re lucky we didn’t get shot.”
I chuckled at the memory. “I tried to convince you guys not to do it.”
“And then ended up joining us instead,” Dylan pointed out.
“Shiloh was persuasive. And I wanted to be just like you guys.”
“I know,” Dylan said. He gave me a half smile. “Shiloh was no saint, and he had his faults, but he loved us. And he’d want us both to be happy.”
I clenched my jaw against the emotion Dylan’s words stirred up in me. “I don’t know if he’d want me to be happy if it meant I was in love with his wife.”
A snort erupted from Dylan, and he shook his head. “Sorry. Not if he was still here, sure. That would be a little weird. But he’s not, Hudson. As much as we both wish he was here, Shiloh is gone. And we have to keep living without him.”
“I feel like I’m still trying to figure out how to do that.” I ran a frustrated hand through my hair. Why did life have to be so hard? So complicated?
“Me too.” He brought his clasped hands up to his face and closed his eyes, as if he were saying a prayer. “But I think you need to figure out what you want and let go of the idea of what Shiloh would want.”
I knew exactly what I wanted. To be a family with Amelia and Quinn. To kiss Amelia every single day and tell her I loved her. To help Quinn fall asleep and not have to leave and go to my house when I was done. The image of what could be was enough to make my heart skip a beat.
“I don’t even know if Amelia’s interested in me like that.” Memories of our kiss in the cabin flashed, but I still couldn’t be absolutely sure I wasn’t imagining at least part of it.
“There’s only one way to find out. I think it’s time you go for what you want this time.”
I threw him a half smile. “Are you calling me out for being a chicken?”
Dylan did a low chicken bock, then shook his head and laughed. “At the risk of sounding too sappy, Hud, you’re one of the best men I’ve ever met in my life, and I don’t say that lightly. You care deeply about people, which I know is what makes you a great doctor and a great friend. You’ll give up your own happiness for someone else’s. You freaking saved Amelia’s life with a broken collarbone, which is a complete rockstar move.”
We both chuckled, releasing some of the tension I’d been feeling.
“I didn’t know it was broken at the time,” I said.
“You would’ve done it anyway.” He lifted a brow.
I’d give it to him. I would have done anything to save her.
“Amelia would be lucky to be with you,” he continued. “And if not Amelia, then someone else who is just as amazing and perfect for you. But you’ll never know if you continue to let fear dictate your actions. You deserve happiness too.”
His words shot straight through me, an emotional dart right where I was most vulnerable. I believed I deserved happiness. Right? At least, on a theoretical level, I believed that. But my actions proved otherwise.
“We almost lost you this week,” Dylan said when I remained quiet. “I want you to really, fully live.”
I let his words sink in, let their truth settle in my soul. I wanted that too. I loved Amelia, and maybe it was time to finally tell her.
“I usually do the pep talks,” I joked with an emotional smile.
“You can take over tomorrow,” Dylan assured me, with his returning teary grin. “I’m feeling wise tonight since I’m getting married.”
“Ah. The inherent wisdom of being a groom.”
“One of the perks.”
The sliding door opened, and Gage stuck his head out. “Are either of you going to eat the last burger?”
“It’s all yours,” Dylan said. He stood and followed Gage, but I stayed outside for another minute. Tomorrow, at the reception. I’d pull Amelia aside and tell her how I felt, then I’d accept whatever happened after that. At least I’d know I tried.
