Page 61 of When Love Becomes A Need
“Hell yeah, it brought back old feelings. It reminded me how fucking hurt and mad I was the last time I saw her. Reminded me why I stopped trusting females and gave up on this relationship thing. Seeing her brought back a lot of ill feelings that I was trying to move on from.”
“There’s not a small part of you that wants her back?”
I smirked. “Why would I want her back when I got you? I’m happy with you, Fatima, and Kylie coming back isn’t going to change that. In fact, it didn’t do anything but confirm how much I’m feeling this, feeling you. I don’t give a damn about Kylie or why she came back. I closed that part of my life. Now I’m trying to work on something with you, but that’s only if you’re not going to let this affect us.”
I reached across the table and grabbed one of her hands into mine. “Now can we move past my ex showing up and finish this date on a good note?”
Fatimafinallysmiled for the first time since we had been here. “Yeah, I shouldn’t have let that get to me anyway.” She shook her head.
“You right, because it’s irrelevant to what we have going on.”
Even though she said she was over the Kylie thing, I could still see something was on Fatima’s mind.
“What’s wrong?”
Her shoulders sunk and her face dropped. She released a deep sigh and balled her hand up under mine.
“My dad called me today.” My eyebrows raised in shock. “I usually ignore his calls, but I was rushing because I was running late and ended up answering. Long story short he wants me to come over and have dinner with him and his new family,” she sighed.
I ran my thumb over the top of her hand, stroking it softly.
“And what did you tell him?”
“I told him I would think about it. I really don’t want to go, but my mom mentioned it would be good for me to let go of my anger toward him. Then he stated my brothers wanted to get to know me. I just…I don’t know how I can be willing to get to know them when they stole my life.”
Fatima had a flat look on her face and her eyes were narrowed. Her orbs were on me, but I could tell her mind was elsewhere. Her lip curled up and she brought the bottom one between her teeth and gnawed on it.
I thought about my words carefully before I spoke. I knew this was a sensitive subject for Fatima, and I didn’t want her to get back in her feelings, but I think she needed to hear this.
“I agree with your mom. Even if you don’t have a relationship with your dad after going to this dinner, I think you should build one with your brothers. At the end of the day, they’re innocent, just like you. What your dad did isn’t their fault, so you shouldn’t hold that against them. Everyone needs closure, and until you get that, you will always have reservations about relationships.”
She continued chewing on her bottom lip. I thought she was going to chew a hole through it. Her nose slightly flared, and she looked off to the side.
“If their mom would have never gotten pregnant, then my dad wouldn’t have left.”
“You don’t know that, baby. The only person to blame is your dad. He’s the one that left you and your mom; he stepped out on his marriage. Your brothers did nothing but be born. You can’t hold that against them.”
Fatima brought her eyes to meet mine. I could see tears building up in them, but she was trying to hold them back.
“You’re right,” she sighed. “It’s just hard not to hold it against them when he was there for them after abandoning me.”
“So, tell him that. Go to that dinner and let him know how you feel. You’re holding in all this hostility isn’t helping anyone. It’s hurting you. Your dad was a dumb nigga to miss out on so much of your life but look at everything you did without him. It was his loss so don’t let what he kept holding you back. Tell him what’s on your mind then let it all go so you can move on.”
“I guess you’re right.” She pulled on her curls. “Will you go with me?”
Giving her hand a small squeeze, I flashed a smile her way. “You know I got you.” The tears on her face disappeared and she was back smiling. This time it was a genuine smile.
The waitress returned with the check and the rest of our evening went well without a hitch. Fatima’s attitude did a complete one-eighty, and now things felt normal. The way me and her connected still amazed me, but it felt good. Fatima had me opening up to her in ways I hadn’t done with anyone in a long time.
Yeah, her dad was dumb as hell to miss out on such a great girl.
CHAPTER 19
Fatima
“You look like you’re in a good mood.” My mom smiled, sitting next to Johnny. She crossed her legs at the knee, and he reached over and grabbed her hands.
It truly made me happy when I saw them. It showed me that one heartbreak shouldn’t hold you back. Johnny was so infatuated with her and always looked at her like he was seeing her for the first time. He was so in tune with her feelings. Whenever my mom wasn’t feeling well or when something was wrong with her, he always knew.
