Page 69 of Panther in the Shadows
"We should sleep." Moira's voice carries reluctance. "A few hours at least. We'll need our strength."
"I know." But I don't let her go. Don't loosen my hold even slightly.
She seems to understand. Her arms tighten around me in response.
"I'm terrified," she whispers against my chest. "Of the fight. Of failing. Of losing you."
"Me too." The admission costs something. "But we're not going into this alone. The brotherhood will be there. Every shifter who can fight. And you'll have your full power for the first time in years. We have a chance, Moira. A real one."
"What if it's not enough?"
The question I've been avoiding since we decided to face Catalina head-on. What if all our preparation, all our strength, all our determination still falls short? What if the sea-walker we're hunting is too powerful, too ancient, too wrong for us to stop?
"Then we go down fighting." I cradle the back of her head. "Making sure she doesn't get to hurt anyone else. That's all we can do."
She's quiet for a long moment. Then she moves, pressing a kiss over my heart. "If something happens to me?—"
"Nothing happens to you. I won't allow it."
"Rafe, you can't promise?—"
"Watch me." I tilt her face up, force her to meet my eyes. "You don't get to make contingency plans for your death. Not right now. Right now we believe we're both walking away from this. Anything else is unacceptable."
Her expression softens. "Same goes for you then. No heroic sacrifices. No putting yourself between me and danger if it means you don't come back."
"I can't promise that."
"Then don't ask me to promise what you won't."
We stare at each other in the dim light. Both of us too stubborn to back down. Both of us terrified of losing the other.
Finally, I pull her close again. "Then we make a different deal. The brotherhood handles Catalina while you free Elspeth and the others. We keep each other alive. Everything else we figure out after."
"Deal." She settles against me, her body relaxing by degrees.
I resume stroking her back. Soothing movements meant to ease her toward sleep. Her breathing gradually slows, deepens. The tension in her muscles fades.
"Rafe?" Her voice is drowsy now.
"Yeah?"
"Thank you. For believing in me. For not trying to keep me away from this fight."
"You're the most powerful person on this island when you stop holding back." I press a kiss to her temple. "I'd be an idiot to try to keep you away. Also pretty sure you'd ignore me and show up anyway."
She laughs softly. "You know me well."
"I'm learning." My arms tighten around her. "Now sleep. We only have a few hours."
She murmurs something incoherent, already halfway gone. Within minutes, her breathing evens out completely. Deep and steady. Safe in my arms for a few hours more.
Sleep should claim me too. Need to be sharp for what's coming. But my mind won't quiet.
Catalina. The sea-walker who was once my lover. Who drowned herself rather than live without her family’s approval. Who came back wrong and dangerous and full of death magic.
In just a few hours we face her in deep water where she's strongest. Where her bound spirits can rise and her power reaches its peak. We're planning to kill something that's already died once and returned stronger.
But Moira sleeps against my chest. This sea witch and innkeeper who makes me believe in possibilities I thought were lost. Who matches my darkness with her own light and doesn't flinch from either.
