Page 73 of The Girl Out of Time
“Goodbye, Emmeline.” Theo turned to leave, but she pulled him back.
“Why did you kiss me? When we jumped off the balcony?”
Pain crossed his eyes before he schooled his face into a more neutral expression. “It was the last resort,” he said in a soft voice. “An assurance you’d open the passage. You know that.”
“I know nothing,” she said, her voice breaking. She was so lost, so confused, like the fluff of a dandelion, helplessly drifting on the wind, waiting to fall wherever the forces dictated. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Emmeline …”
She grabbed his hand as a single clear thought shone through her confusion. She didn’t know her way in this world, but wherever he was, she’d felt safe. From the first day on the beach, he’d been her anchor—regardless of what came before, in another world. He was the light when she was lost, and the wisp of shadow in her perfect fantasy, her dream wedding. Because it would never be the dream. Not without Theo in it.
“Don’t go,” she said. “It’s not too late yet.”
He shook his head. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”
She examined his face, looking for any twitch or tell revealing his thoughts. Did he feel anything in that kiss? Anything else for her above friendship?
And if he did, what would she do?
She pressed a hand to his cheek and looked into his eyes. “Tell me.” Her voice turned into a half-whisper. “Say something.”Say you don’t want me to marry Daniel. Say that we could be together forever—through adventure and peace, and storms and sunshine.
Theo moaned and touched her forehead with his. “I can’t.” It was as if the words had been tortured out of him—and then he was gone, a phantasm out of one of her books, and Emmeline remained there like a statue, frozen, lightly trembling, and waiting to crack.
“You look splendid, dear,” the duke said, as he awaited her in front of the small church in Redbridge. She’d wiped her tears, although some redness in her eyes remained; but that could be explained. A bride was supposed to be overwhelmed with emotion.
“Thank you, Your Grace.”
He smiled. “In a short while, you may call me Father. I’m very grateful you’re marrying my son. I’ve been worried about mistakes I might have made, choosing this match.”
“It was you?” She’d always thought the duchess had arranged the marriage.
“My wife approved. But yes, it was me.”
She laid her hand on the crook of his elbow, and he patted it. “It’s hard for parents to know sometimes if what they’re doing is the best for their children. You think they should know, but I find it’s as easy to be confusedin my old age as it was in my youth.” He blinked. “But, never you worry. Don’t let an old man’s ramblings ruin your day.”
He led her into the church.
Daniel had gotten his small affair; there were a few friends and acquaintances and family members, but it was nowhere near glamorous. The scent of roses gathered in bouquets around the nave followed her as she passed pews and people like they were ghosts, illusions. Daniel awaited at the end of her strange, dreamlike trail. His hair was perfectly styled, not a lock out of place, and he wore a crisp black coat with a silver-striped waistcoat, matching the silver lace bordering her dress. He turned to her when she stopped before him, and for a second, before he smiled at her, his face held a strange sadness—one that, perhaps, she’d find easier to understand if she weren’t so busy keeping up her own spirits.
She’d made her choice. Maria may not have wanted this, but Emmeline did. She’d decided she did.
“Dearly beloved …” the priest began.
Emmeline’s eyes passed over the guests, pushing his speech into the background. Louisa was clutching her hands, bouncing on her feet, as if she couldn’t wait to come and hug her. The duchess sat dignified, doing her best to ignore Louisa’s behavior. Two benches behind them sat Mr. Wexley, and as their eyes met, he gave her that half-mysterious, half-amused smile.
“Into which holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined …”
Emmeline’s gaze traveled further still and stopped at the far wall.Theo. He stood next to a couple of villagers, and her knees nearly buckled.
“If any man can show any just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or forever hold his peace.” The priest paused.
Emmeline’s eyes locked with Theo’s as if held together by a chain. Perhaps that was why he came: to stop the wedding in the most dramatic fashion possible. It would be like Eleanor’s wedding inThe Lord of Two Hearts—and Theo had read the book!
But he stayed quiet, and her heart sank.
So he felt nothing for her. Perhaps it served her right. What did she know of her own feelings? What did she know of the world? Of love?
We love you. We want you to be happy,her father’s voice echoed in her mind.
